Spam Of The Week

This week's spam comes from the "Lottery Draw."

Subject line: ! ! ! FÉLICITATION ! ! !

LE ROYAUME-UNI EN COLABORATION AVEC LA COMPAGNIE D’EXPLOITATION
DESMINES D’OR. RECOMPENSE INTERNATIONALE DE LA PROMOTION DE LONDRE.SIEGE/
OUAGADOUGOU AU BURKINA-FASO,12EME. AVENUE KWAME N'KRUMAH 01 BP.RÉFÉRENCE
DE GAGNANT:LP/26510460037/03.
GROUPE : 24/00319
www.acculotto.com
AVIS DE GAIN ACCORDE
IL EST NOTRE PLAISIR DE VOUS INFORMER PAR CETTE DECLARATION DES
GAGNANTS DE LONDRES DES MILLIONS DE RÉCOMPENSES INTERNE DE LA LOTERIE TENUE A
LA DATE DU 29 DECEMBRE 2007. VOTRE ADRESSE EMAIL A ETE SELECTIONNE PAR
NOS COLLECTEURS ELECTRONIQUES DE VISITEURS DE SITE WEB DANS
L'IDENTIFICATION DE VOTRE PATRONAGE AUX SERVICES D'INTERNET.

DANS L'ASPIRATION FINALE, VOTRE NOM A ETE ATTACHE AU BILLET LE NUMERO
6325698-44596-222, AVEC LE NUMERO DE SERIE 410-32659, DESSINANT LES
NUMEROS CHANCEUX 4014-236985744-596 QUI A PAR CONSEQUENT GAGNE DANS LA
22EME CATEGORIE.

VOUS AVEZ ETE DONC APPROUVE POUR UNE SOMME FORFAITAIRE DE
(EUROS €850,000.00 HUIT CENTS ET CINQUANTE MILLE EUROS), COMPTANT N°
ACCREDITE DE DOSSIER:LP/26510460037/03. C'EST UN PRIX TOTAL COMPTANT DE
(EURO €48.000.000.000 QUARANTE HUIT MILLIARDS D'EURO) MIS EN COMMUN
ENTRE 22 PAYS INTERNATIONAUX DANS CETTE CATEGORIE. TOUS LES PARTICIPANTS
ONT ETE CHOISIS PAR UN SYSTEME DE VOTE A PARTIR D'ORDINATEUR TIRE DE
25.000 NOMS D'AFRIQUE,D'AUSTRALIE, DE NOUVELLE ZELANDE, D'AMERIQUE, EUROPE,
D'AMERIQUE DU NORD ET D'ASIE EN TANT QU'ELEMENT DU PROGRAMME
INTERNATIONAL DE PROMOTION QUI EST CONDUIT ANNUELLEMENT POUR ENCOURAGER
L'UTILISATION DE L'INTERNET ET DES PROGRAMMES BASES PAR INTERNET.

NOUS SOMMES ENCHANTES DE VOUS EXPRIMER NOS FELICITATIONS SINCERES.
NOUS ESPERONS QU'AVEC UNE FRACTION DE VOTRE ARGENT GAGNE, VOUS AURIEZ
AU MOINS LE PRIVILEGE DANS VOTRE SOCIETE ET PARTICIPER EGALEMENT A NOS
PROMOTIONS DE HAUT PRIX L'ANNEE PROCHAINE, PLUS DE 100 MILLIONS D’EUROS
DE LA LOTERIE INTERNATIONALE.

POUR VOS INFORMATIONS SUR LA FAÇON DONT VOUS COMMENCEREZ LE TRAITEMENT
ET LE VIREMENT DE CE FONDS VERS VOTRE COMPTE INDIQUE DE VOTRE CHOIX,
VEUILLEZ CONTACTER LE DIRECTEUR DE RECLAMATION INDIQUE CI-DESSOUS POUR
RECEVOIR VOTRE ARGENT DE GAIN IMMEDIATEMENT :

LOTERIE NATIONALE PROMOTIONS/PRIX DONNANT LA RÉCOMPENSE
12EME .AVENUE KWAME N'KRUMAH
OUAGADOUGOU BURKINA FASO.
NOM : Mr.Mohammed Salif.
Email :claiiming_info_bf01@yahoo.fr

RAPPELEZ-VOUS QUE CETTE RECLAMATION DE GAIN EST FIXE A 14JOUR
OUVRABLE,A DEFAULT TOUS LES FONDS SERONT RETOURNES AU MINISTERE DES AFFAIRES
ECONOMIQUES COMME NON REVENDIQUES.

NOTE : AFIN D'EVITER UN RETARD INUTILE ET DES COMPLICATIONS,
MENTIONNES VOS REFERENCE ET NUMEROS DE LOT DANS CHACUN DE VOS
CORRESPONDANCES AVEC NOUS OU VERS LA BANQUE DE NOTRE COMMANDITAIRE DU MEME RANG.
A CAS OU IL Y AURA UN CHANGEMENT QUELCONQUE DE VOS ADRESSES, INFORMEZ
LE DIRECTEUR POUR TRAITER VOTRE TRANSACTION AUSSITOT QUE POSSIBLE.

! ! ! FÉLICITATION ! ! !

LES FELICITATIONS DE TOUT NOTRE PERSONNEL ET VOUS NOUS REMERCIONS DE
FAIRE PARTIE DE NOTRE PROGRAMME DE PROMOTIONS. N'IMPORTE QUELLE
INFRACTION DE CONFIDENTIALITE DE LA PART DES GAGNANTS RESULTERA A LA
DISQUALIFICATION.

NOUS SOUHAITONS QUE VOUS AYEZ CONTINUE A GAGNER DE BONNES FORTUNES.LES
MEILLEURS VOEUX.
LA DIRECTION DE L’ORGANISATION DE LOTERIE.

Thanks. We salute you

The Hek

Vote for the Canadian Blog Awards

Facebook Asked To Pull Scrabulous Game

According to CBC News, the makers of Scrabble have asked Facebook to remove the Scrabulous application. Apparently, it infringes the game's copyright.

Outrageous I say!

But understandable.

Still, I love Scrabulous. I'm addicted to Facebook, but I'm more addicted to Scrabulous. If I spend an hour on Facebook, 40 of those 60 minutes are spent on Scrabulous.

Let's hope Hasbro and Facebook can work out a deal. Scrabulous is awesome, especially when I dominate my opponents (and sometimes get dominated by my opponents, but that is not important).

The Hek

Vote for the Canadian Blog Awards

Canadian Blog Awards - Voting Underway

The Canadian Blog Awards are underway and a couple of my projects/collaborations have received nominations.

- And Now, A Word From The Hek has been nominated in the "Best Blog" category.

- The Audio Circus has been nominated in the "Best Podcaster/Vlogger" category.

- PublicBroadcasting.ca (a website I contribute to) has been nominated in the "Best Entertainment/Cultural Blog" category.

To vote for the Best Blog, click here; to vote for the Best Podcaster/Vlogger, click here; and to vote for the Best Entertainment/Cultural Blog, click here.

The first round of voting will end on January 21, 2008. You can only vote once per category/per round.

For more information, visit the Canadian Blog Awards' website.

If you do vote for me, thank you very much. I really appreciate the support.

The Hek

Glaus For Rolen

It's official.

The Blue Jays have acquired 3B Scott Rolen from the St. Louis Cardinals, in exchange for 3B Troy Glaus.

When you break it down, it's a fair trade. Both players are around the same age and earn roughly the same salary. Both players are coming off seasons that were cut short because of injuries. Both players needed a change of scenery. There are some differences. Glaus is more of a power hitter, while Rolen is more of a contact hitter.

Unfortunately, I am a bit skeptical as to how this trade will improve the Jays.

Don't get me wrong, Rolen is a great player. He used to be one of the top players in the National League (check his stats from 1997-2004; they are phenomenal). However, over the last few seasons, Rolen's statistics and physical health have diminished. He'll probably make at least one trip to the disabled list in 2008. There's nothing you can do when you're banged up. You can't help your team.

With Rolen, the Blue Jays are taking a risk. Fortunately, it won't be a big loss as Glaus is in the same boat as Rolen.

It will be interesting to watch Rolen play the hot corner in the American League. If anything does happen to him, John MacDonald will be there to fill in.

The Hek

*Never injured: Episode 67 of the Audio Circus*

Tell Me A Story

Episode 67 of the Audio Circus is now available!

This week: Some good ol' fashion bedtime stories.

To download, subscribe, or for more information, visit the show's website.

After the Audio Circus, check out the CanCon Cast.

The Hek

Spam Of The Week

This week's contribution comes from Suleman Muhammed:

My Dear Good Day,

PLEASE URGENT ATTN.

Do accept my sincere apologies if my mail does not meet your personal ethics.I am Mr SULAMAN MUHAMMED The manager of bill and exchange at the foreign remittance department of my Bank.

In my department I discovered an abandoned sum of US$8.5M, (Eight Million, Five Hundred Thousand US Dollars) with account number 14-2558-5976 that belongs to one of our foreign customers who died along with his wife and only daughter in a plane crash of Alaska Airlines Flight number 261 which crashed on January 31, 2000. You shall read more about the crash on visiting this site:
http://www.cnn.com/2000/US/02/01/alaska.airlines.list/

The owner of this account is Mr. Morris Thompson an American and great industrialist and a resident of Alaska. It is therefore upon this discovery that I now decided to make this business proposal to you and for our bank to release the money to you. You have to follow the instruction which I will be send to you as the next of kin or relation to the deceased for safety and subsequent disbursement since nobody is coming for it and I don't want this money to go into our bank treasury as unclaimed bill.

The banking law and guidelines here stipulates that if such money remained unclaimed after nine 9 years, the money will be transfered into the bank treasury as unclaimed fund. The money has now stayed more than seven to eight years and I am preparing documentaion to prove that this money has been transfered to our bank treasury. It will be between me and you only that will know that the money is not transfered into our treasure.

This request of foreigner as next of kin in this transaction is occasioned by the fact that the customer was a foreigner and as an insider i cannot stand as next of kin to a foreigner. In appreciation of your assistance, I am offering you 40% of the total sum. 10% for contingencies (cost of transfer/other charges) likely to be incurred during the course of transaction, while the remaining 50% is for me.Upon receipt of your reply.

I will send to you by fax or email the text of the application which you will complete and forward to our bank asking for this money to be paid to you as the next of kin to Mr;Morris Thomson. I will not fail to bring to your notice that this transaction is hitch-free and that you should not entertain any fear as all required arrangements have been made for the transfer. You should contact me immediately as soon as you receive this mail through the above email. PLEASE DO NOT HESITATE TO CONTACT ME IMMEDIATELY YOU SHOULD CONSIDER MY URGENT REQUEST.

Yours Faithfully,
Mr SULEMAN MUHAMMED

Thanks Suleman. We salute you.

The Hek

Hoffa's On A Tear

Here's your shock of the day

According to Doug Smith, former Raptor Rafael "Hoffa" Araújo is living up to his potential......in Russia.

Playing for Spartak of the Russian Basketball Federation, Hoffa is averaging 11.4 points/game, has a 57% field goal percentage, and is 61% from the line. You probably don't believe me, so here's the link to prove all this. Ignore the fact they spelled his name wrong.

This leads me to one of two conclusions: Either A) Hoffa plays better in an non-NBA setting; or B) RBF players are really that bad.

The Hek

What If We All Loved Bush?

When someone says, "I hate George W. Bush," do they mean the person or do they mean the politician?

If you hate the person, then you're being callous. If you mean the politician, then you might have some legitimacy. However, 'hate' is a strong word. A more appropriate word would be 'dislike.' And why would you want to hate George W. Bush, the politician? What did he do wrong?

Oh wait...

Seriously, if you're living in Baghdad and the President allows an air-strike that misses it's intended target and instead, kills your family, then maybe you have a reason to hate him. But if you're living in a swanky condo or your parents' basement (take your pick), eating Cheetos, drinking a can of Red Bull, and looking up Mr. Plow clips on YouTube, then what the hell gives you the right to say "I hate George W. Bush?"

Think about this, you're chilling in your palace (again, take your pick), balancing your laptop on your stomach, waiting for your significant other to arrive so you can have passionate sex, which means you're having more sex then I am. Life is good and you have the audacity to say that you hate the President of the United States?!

Look, if you want to hate him, that's your business. But at least have some justification for your hate. For example, health care, poverty, etc. But that still falls under the category of 'dislike.'

The Hek

Shameless Self Promotion

Check out my latest article in Afterword.

The Hek

*No Shame at all: Episode 66 of the Audio Circus*

You Might Be A Canadian

Episode 66 of the Audio Circus has been released.

This week: Some Canadian humour and a dip into my voicemail.

To download, subscribe, or for more information, visit the show's website.

After the Audio Circus, check out the CanCon Cast.

The Hek

Spam Of The Week

How did Mike Huckabee take the Iowa primary? Two words: Chuck Norris.

Anyway, our spammer this week is Zam Taamar.

I am Zam tamaar, I am 45 years old married with three (3) children the Bank Manager of BANK OF AFRICA BURK,INA FASO I obtained your address particulars from an Internet address listing, and hence I contacted you in confidence on this very urgent and confidential proposition that is of mutual benefit to us all and our children.

On 27th of May 2001, a Foreigner Mr. Albert G. Hudson A Gold Consultant/merchandise here in my Country (BURKINA FASO) operated a domiciliary Account, which its value is USD$15, 000,000.00 (Fifteen Million United States Dollars) in my branch, without presenting a usual information on his Next of Kin beneficiary, we accepted this due to the fact that Banks are conservative and will always honor a customer's wishes, especially high net worth customers.

For about four (7) years now, we have been looking forward to any vital information on the depositor, but it has been confirmed that the original depositor (Mr. Albert G. Hudson) has died in London, on making this discovery my Bank has been expecting the relative or next of kin of the original depositor to come up for the claim of this funds, but since no one has turned up for the claim and fund is still sitting in my Bank in the Dormant Account Portfolio, which I have been protecting awaiting the appropriate time to convert this fund for personal utilization.

I see it as the appropriate time to actualize the arrangement, but this could not be actualized without the help of a Foreign Partner, hence I have resolved to contact you in confidence to work as my Foreign partner as to have this claim processed in your favor, by presenting you as a distant relative of this customer for the immediate transfer of the funds into an Account that will provided by you as the beneficiary, pending my arrival there in your Country for sharing and investment purposes, which will be carried out without your assistance there in your Country.

This call is important due the Banking Law here in my Country, that domiciliary Accounts that have been Dormant for 7 Years, should be revert to the Federal Government Treasury, hence the partnership is essential as I have rehearsed and perfected all arrangement on this, that it is not necessary you come from the same country with him as you will not be required to visit my country.

The method of achieving the objective of transferring this money abroad in your favor as the beneficiary, is completely legal and proper way is simple, we should operate under an accredited Law Firm of this Bank (representing you as BENEFICIARY) to execute a series of affidavits in support of your claim. These will be approved. The money transfer paperwork itself will include a certificate of origin so that the receiving bank does not ask questions or refuse the money as money laundering. Also, the paperwork will include proper certification that the funds being transferred are from non criminal sources. In short this will be a proper and legal money transfer and there is no risk, hence the confidentiality is maintained on your side as the beneficiary to the Estate of the late Mr. Albert G. Hudson.

To actualize this arrangement, from your side as a partner I will require the following details:-

NAME IN FULL.

ADDRESS IN FULL.

YOUR MOBILE NUMBER.

AGE.

MARITAL STATUS AND NATURE OF JOB.

This transaction is guaranteed to succeed without any problems. On the receipt the above requested information, I will give you my complete address, including phone/ fax etc and any further clarifications and step you may require.

I have resolved that the sharing should be thus:-

55% is for me as the Initiator and the Bank Manager.

40% is for you as my Foreign Partner.

5% is for reimbursement of every expense that we may incur in the course of actualizing the arrangement.

Forward your response to this my confidential e-mail: (zam_tamaar@myway.com).

Yours Truly,

zam tamaar

Thanks Zam. We salute you.

The Hek

Vote For Bosh

Chris Bosh needs your support.



He's got my vote. 20.3 points/game. 9.2 rebounds/game. Heart and soul of the Raptors.

The Hek

Drastic Measures

You might remember this post I made at the end of 2006.

Now that it's 2008, it's time to ask the following questions:

Did I follow through on my 2007 resolution? Not really. Taking charge and pursuing your goals is easy. It's the outside factors that make things difficult. I applied to so many media jobs and sent out so many proposals. All I received was "thanks, but no thanks" or no response at all. What really bugs is me finding out that friends of mine who still go to University are getting co-op placements, internships, or lining themselves up for "post-grad employment." I wonder how they can easily get into their field of work, while I've been struggling for the last two years sending out thousands of applications. Am I bitter? Absolutely. Am I jealous? You bet.

Is it time to take drastic measures? Not sure on that one. There's a fine line between taking a chance and doing something stupid. It's all a matter of weighing your options.

Has life gotten better or worse? A little better, but I am nowhere near where I want to be. In May, I started a new "non-radio" job and it was the best thing that happened to me this past year. It's steady work, steady pay, my co-workers are phenomenal, and I get a lot satisfaction out of it. I'm very lucky to have this job.

I still have to deal with the pressure I put on myself as well as outside pressures. I still have to deal with people who tell me that radio is "a garbage job in a garbage industry." If I wanted to throw away my goals, I would have done it by now. But I refuse to quit. I'd rather die trying then capitulate.

What will happen to me 2008? I don't know. I really don't know and I refuse to make predictions. We'll just have to wait and see.

Fasten your seat belts.

The Hek

*Tune in: Episode 65 of the Audio Circus*

The Best Of 2007

Happy New Year!!!

Episode 65 of the Audio Circus is now available.

This week: The best of 2007.

To download, subscribe, or for more information, visit the show's website.

The Hek

Spam Of The Week

This one comes from Natasha Frank:

My name is Mr,s Natasha Frank of Tanzania, I am married to
(EngMr.Pius frank) from united kingdom(u.k) who has
an appointment in Ouagadougou, Burkina Faso as the chief managing
director to(Abbas Gold Mining Association Burkina-Faso West Africa)
under Engineering project/contract awarding
section.

My husband died as a result of plan crash in Burkina-Faso ,
while he was coming back from Accra Ghana
on project inspection on Saturday 10 th December 2005.

Before his death as a result of our joint account
venture we have $7.3 million (us)dollars in our fixed
deposit account.

Due to my bareness I don’t have a child and am
of age, I am 68 years now and my doctor told me that
based on my kidney and liver failure disease. I can
not stay to live up three mount ahead, and I am having
serious problem with my husband’s family
members.

I am not afraid of death hence I know where I am
going. I know that I am going to be in the bosom of
the Lord. Exodus 14 VS 14 says that the lord will
fight
my course and I shall hold my peace.

Therefore I need a God fearing person who will assure
me that he/she will use this fund to help the
Motherless baby homes, Orphanage and Charity
organization, Less privileged
Propagating the word of God.

I took this decision because I don't have any child
that will inherit this money. As soon as I receive
your reply I shall give you the contact of the Bank.

I want you to always pray for me because I don’t
have more days to live.

Thanks Natasha. Get well soon. We salute you.

The Hek

Howard And Desmond

From Wiretap, one of my favourite radio shows.

Poor Jonathan Goldstein. One day he's going to snap and kill Howard.



The Hek

Make Believe Social Life Redux

Episode 63 of the Audio Circus has been re-released! Hopefully it works this time.

*crosses fingers*

To download, subscribe, or for more information, visit the show's website.

Happy Holidays to you and your family.

The Hek

Spam Of The Week

This week's spam comes from JC Martins:

I am MR JC MARTINS the bill and exchange manager in charge of auditing and accounting unit foreign remittance department of African development bank(ADB)ouaga-burkina faso in west Africa.
With due respect and regards I have decided to contact you on a business transaction that will be very beneficial to both of us at the end of the transaction.

During our investigation and auditing in the bank, my department came across a very huge sum of money belonging to a deceased customer, a foreigner who died in a plane crash with his family during their vacation journey and the fund has been dormant in his account with the bank without any claim of the fund in our custody either from his family or relation before my discovery to this development,Although personally, I kept this information secrete within myself and to enable the whole plans and idea be profitable and successful during the time of execution.

The amount involved is $ 5 million U.S.A dollars ( Five Million U.S.A Dollars) Meanwhile, all the necessary arrangement and directives needed to put claim over this fund as the next of kin to the deceased is ready, Upon your acceptance all the information will be forward to you as soon as you indicate your interest and willingness to assist me and also benefit your self to this great business opportunity.

In fact, I could have done this deal alone but because of my position in this country as a civil servant,we are not allowed to operate a foreign account and would eventually raise an eye brow on my side during the time of transfer because I work in this bank, this is the actual reason why it will require a second party or fellow who will forward claims as the next of kin with affidavit of trust of Oath to the bank and also present a foreign account to the bank where you will need the said fund to be transferred into, after due verification and clarification to designated bank account.

We agree that 30 % of this money will be for you as foreign partner, in respect to the provision of a foreign account, 10 % will be set aside for expenses incurred during the business and 60 % would be for me. There after I will visit your country for disbursement according to the percentages indicated. Therefore to enable the immediate transfer of this fund to you as arranged, you must apply first to the bank as relations or next of kin of the deceased indicating your bank name, your bank account number, your private telephone and fax number for easy and effective communication and location where in the money will be remitted .

Upon receipt of your reply, I will send to you by fax or email, the text of the application. I will not fail to bring to your notice that this transaction is hitch free and that you should not entertain any atom of fear as all required arrangements have been made for the transfer.

Please you have been adviced to keep top secret as I am still in service and intend to retire from service after I conclude this deal with you, I will be monitoring the whole situation here in the bank until you confirm the money in your account and ask me to come down there for subsequent shearing of the fund according to percentages previously indicated and further investment,either in your country or any other country you may advice me to invest in.

All other necessary information will be sent to you when I hear from you, I suggest you get back to me as soon as possible, stating your wish in this deal.

Waiting for your soonest response.
Yours faithfully,

I am MR JC MARTINS ,
Bill and Exchange Manager,
African Develoment Bank(ADB)

Thanks JC. We salute you.

The Hek

Dark Knight Trailer

Wow! Wow! Wow!

A psychotic Joker. You gotta love it.

I am putting this film at the top of my 2008 "Must See" list.

The Hek

Don Chevrier: 1938 - 2007

Canadian sportscaster Don Chevrier has passed away.

For many, including myself, Chevrier will be remembered as the original television voice of the Blue Jays. Like his radio counterpart, Tom Cheek, Chevrier provided solid play-by-play for over two decades. He was the man in the television booth during Toronto's "glory days."

As a young fan, I always viewed Chevrier as a wise and articulate elder. He seemed to know every single detail about any baseball player, regardless of whether the player wore a Blue Jay uniform, or an opponent's uniform. His voice was authoritative but not commanding.

He was a versatile broadcaster, covering a number of sports. Along with the Blue Jays, Chevrier was the play-by-play voice for the Ottawa Senators, a number of Grey Cup finals, and many Olympic events. In fact, the last time I had the pleasure of watching and listening to him was during the 2006 Winter Olympics when he covered the men's and women's curling tournament for NBC.

A fixture of the Canadian sporting scene, he described many great moments. He will be sorely missed.

RIP Don Chevrier.

The Hek

50 Ways To Leave Your Liver

My friend recently scored some DVDs of The Muppet Show.

Sure enough, we all gathered at his house and watched some classic episodes.

As a child, I was too young to appreciate the show's humour and it's homage to vaudeville. Many years later, I get a second chance. What's unique about this show was that the characters were geared towards children; while the comedy was geared towards adults.

Here's a perfect example:



The Hek

*It's time to start the music: Episode 64 of the Audio Circus*

Musical Brother

Episode 64 of the Audio Circus has been released!

This week, my exclusive, one-on-one interview with BOB DYLAN's brother Jeb.

To download, subscribe, or for more information, visit the show's website.

The Hek

PS: If you have trouble downloading the episode, let me know. Thanks!

The Mitchell Report

I really don't want to write about "Baseball's Steroids Era."

The Mitchell Report has been released and is available on most news sites. If you want to read it, go right ahead. Everything that needed to be said was said. It sickens me to see all the talented ball players that were named in this report. Many careers will be tarnished because of it.

I prefer to write about positive baseball stories. For example, the Blue Jays have signed David Eckstein. That is a huge boost for the Jays. Eckstein is a great leadoff hitter and has a solid on-base percentage. The leadoff spot was a nasty hole for Toronto this past season. Reed Johnson missed a few months due to back surgery and still wasn't 100% for the remainder of the season. Vernon Wells also led off, but despite his poor 2007 campaign, he should be in the number three spot. Eckstein will not tear the cover off the ball, but he will get on base. Don't forget, he was the 2006 World Series MVP.

Meanwhile, in regards to the Mitchell Report, I will say this: I am not surprised about Roger Clemens. At age 40, the man's fastball had better velocity then it did at age 20. That is genetically impossible.

For the record, here are the current and former Blue Jays that were named in the report. Based on his investigation, George Mitchell has stated that these players took and/or received performance-enhancing drugs.

- Troy Glaus
- Greg Zaun
- Roger Clemens
- Benito Santiago
- David Segui
- Glenallen Hill
- Howie Clark
- Scott Schoeneweis

The Hek

As I Listen To 'Wiretap'

drowning radio
hanging onto passionate dreams
struggling to survive

The Hek

Chuck Norris Approved

Barack Obama has Oprah Winfrey's support.

However, former Arkansas Governor and Presidential candidate Mike Huckabee has a supporter who is more powerful then 1000 Oprahs: CHUCK NORRIS



The Hek

I Can't Believe It's Me Either

There are a lot of contenders worthy of the U.S. Presidential Office.

But there is one man, who I think would make an excellent President?

STEVEN SEAGAL

Case in point:



The Hek

*Very refreshing: Episode 63 of the Audio Circus*

Make Believe Social Life

Episode 63 of the Audio Circus is now available!

This week, I show off some of my impressions. There's also a short story I wrote called "A Quiet Friday Night."

To download, subscribe, or for more information, visit the show's website.

The Hek

Spam Of The Week

This one comes from Daf Fadel:

FROM THE MINISTRE DE LA CONSTRUCTION

Attn: CEO

I am interested in the partnership investment program with your corporation. First permit me to introduce myself as Daf Fadel ministre de la construction of Western Sahara state in the democratic republic (a tiny island desert). Being the executive minister of my State.

I awarded the contract of IRRIGATION to Portuguese Firm worthy several millions of dollars. In the execution of that project the Portuguese Firm discovered large amount of gold in one of the contract site.

I collaborated with the Portuguese Firm on a mutual agreement on the proceed of which I have received my share of 15.5musd.

As the minister, I cannot introduce or circulate these funds into the Western Sahara banking system considering my provisional duty and the considering the fact that I earn less than 1,000us$dollars monthly coupled with the Bureau of conduct guide lines and
regulations for Public Civil Servants.

The above situation prompted my decision to solicit your co-operation to take delivery of this fund into your custody for my proposed investment, as you will be adequately compensated with $ 6.500,000 millions.

I will arrange all necessary procedures in ensuring a smooth process for the funds to get to you. I will appreciate you contact me once you receive this fax via my satellite phone above indicating your capability and willingness to enable me to give you more details of my modus operandi of getting this money to you hitch free.

This matter requires your urgent attention and confidentiality whatever your decision.

Best Regards,

Minister, Daf Fadel

Thanks Daf. We salute you.

The Hek

I Got 99 Problems, But A Playlist Ain't One

The Hek's Super Playlist continues to grow! New entries are in red.

1. Kennedy Killed the Hat - Buck 65
2. I bought some books - Black Boot Trio
3. Watching the Wheels - John Lennon
4. Vacation - The Go-Go's
5. Like a Prayer - Madonna
6. Night Swimming - REM
7. Chicago - Sufjan Stevens
8. Ring, Ring - Abba
9. Call on Me - Eric Prydz
10. November Rain - Guns N Roses
11. Cruel Summer - Bannanarama
12. Hung up - Madonna
13. 463 - Buck 65
14. Judy is a Punk - The Ramones
15. The Laws have Changed - The New Pornographers
16. Portland, Oregon - Loretta Lynn feat. Jack White
17. Suzanne - Leonard Cohen
18. The Card Cheat - The Clash
19. Canadian Railroad Trilogy - Gordon Lightfoot
20. Boys in the Bright White Sports Car - Trooper
21. Mandy - Barry Manilow
22. Let's Get Together - Al Green
23. Mickey - Toni Basil
24. Bodies - Drowning Pool
25. Folson Prison Blues - Johnny Cash
26. Bawitaba - Kid Rock
27. Losing Grip - Avril Lavigne
28. City of New Orleans - Arlo Guthrie
29. Pump it - Black Eye Peas
30. Lonely Old Eyes - Neko Case
31. Immigrant Song - Led Zepplin
32. Philadelphia Freedom - Elton John
33. Don't Walk Away Eileen - Sam Roberts
34. Bring the Noise - Public Enemy & Anthrax
35. Maneater - Nelly Furtado
36. Gypsies, Tramps & Thieves - Cher
37. My Immortal - Evanescense
38. Hips Don't Lie - Shakira
39. Welcome to the Jungle - Guns and Roses
40. Bad Habit - The Offspring
41. LDN - Lily Allen
42. Man I use to Be - K-OS
43. Lolipop - Aqua
44. Banquet - Bloc Party
45. The Sign - Ace of Base
46. Rise Above - Black Flag
47. Devil Went Down to Georgia - Charlie Daniels Band
48. Thank God I'm a Country Boy - John Denver
49. Hello - Lionel Richie
50. River - Joni Mitchell
51. Romantic Rights - Death From Above 1979
52. Knock on Wood - Amy Stewart
53. My Heart Skips A Beat - Buck Owens
54. Levon - Elton John
55. Use It - The New Pornographers
56. The Boy In The Bubble - Paul Simon
57. Graceland - Paul Simon
58. Everywhere - Fleetwood Mac
59. Head Over Feet - Alanis Morrisette
60. Ring Of Fire - Johnny Cash
61. Inside And Out - Feist
62. Crosseyed And Painless - Talking Heads
63. Give It To Me - Timberland feat. Nelly Furtado and Justin Timberlake
64. Intervention - Arcade Fire
65. I'm Afraid Of Brittany Spears - LiveonRelease
66. For Whom The Bell Tolls - Metallica
67. Sundown - Gordon Lightfoot
68. Hard To Concentrate - Red Hot Chilli Peppers
69. Sabotage - Beastie Boys
70. Diamonds From Sierra Leone - Kanye West
71. One Thing - Finger Eleven
72. Changes - 2pac
73. Gone Away - The Offspring
74. Harder, Better, Faster, Stronger - Daft Punk
75. 1234 - Feist
76. Relax, Take It Easy - Mika
77. God Save The Queen - The Sex Pistols
78. The Message - Grandmaster Flash and the Furious Five
79. Miami - Will Smith
80. Rebel Rebel - David Bowie
81. TV Party - Black Flag
82. Ballad of Peter Pumpkinhead - Crash Test Dummies
83. 99 Problems - Jay Z
84. Sorrow - Bad Religion
85. Body Count - Body Count
86. What's the Frequency, Kenneth - REM
87. What Do I Get - The Buzzcocks

The Hek

Save The Parkdale Foodbank

From Justin Beach and Publicbroadcasting.ca:

While the mechanism still isn't in place for auto-withdrawals or online donations I've set up a facebook group called $5 For the Parkdale Food Bank. The purpose of the group is to gather people who would be willing to make a $5/month donation (via bank account or credit card) to the food bank.

$5 may not seem like much but 500 people donating $5 a month would put the food bank close to it's annual operating budget of $33,000. The goal is to find 1,000 people and significantly increase the food banks budget.

Benjamin Mueller-Heaslip of the Parkdale Revolutionary Orchestra is also trying to organize some last minute fundraisers. More details on that will be posted as they become available.

The Parkdale Food Bank currently feeds 600 families and will close in January without help. Please contribute in any way you can.

If you'd like to simply mail a cheque you can send it to ST. FRANCIS TABLE, 1322 Queen Street West, Toronto Ontario, M6K 1L4

If you're willing to make monthly donations join the Facebook Group and we'll let you know when the mechanisms are in place.

If you'd like to participate in a fundraiser please contact Benjamin Mueller-Heaslip at info@parkdalerevolutionaryorchestra.com

UPDATE

Benjamin Meuller-Heaslip of the Parkdale Revolutionary Orchestra is organizing a fundraiser for the Parkdale Food Bank. Here are the details so far.

Time and Place

Date: Sunday, December 16, 2007
Time: 3:00pm - 9:00pm
Location:
The Cadillac Lounge
1296 Queen Street West
Toronto, ON

Five-hour Music Marathon in support of the Parkdale Food Bank!

10 half-hour sets including:

The Parkdale Revolutionary Orchestra
Ronley Teper
Michael Holt
Book of Gnomes
The Ugly Bug Band

More in the works

The Hek

*TAC: Episode 62*

No Armour In Parliament

Episode 62 of the Audio Circus is now available.

This week: Ridiculous British laws and music by Infotourist.

To download, subscribe, or for more information, visit the show's website.

The Hek

Tell Me What You're Waiting For

Is it me, or is Feist's "1234" getting way too much airplay?

Seriously, I hate to say it, but "1234" is being overplayed.

It's a shame, it was a pretty good song.

The Hek

Four Years!

It's my blog's four-year anniversary today and I almost forgot about it.

Here's the obligatory link to the first-ever post.

Thank you for reading. Thank you for your continuing support.

The Hek

Forgiveness

facing your true fears
noble head goes underwater
rise in the new light

The Hek

*Check out Episode 61 of the Audio Circus*

A Warrior Speaks

The Audio Circus is back!

This week: My sit-down interview with Beowulf.

To download, subscribe, or for more information, visit the show's website.

The Hek

Spam Of The Week

Before I start, I have this bad feeling some of you were unable to read the last few posts. I put up this NHL widget and I think it created a bunch of problems. So, my question to you is, can you see the posts now?

Meanwhile, our spam this week comes from Yaro Ojo:

FROM THE DESK OF MR.YARO OJO.
AUDITING AND ACCOUNTING MANAGER,
BANK OF AFRICA,(B.O.A)
OUAGADOUGOU-BURKINA FASO,
WEST AFRICA.

DEAR FRIEND,

I AM MR.YARO OJO,THE AUDITTING MANAGER OF BANK OF AFRICA BURKINA
FASO.DURING MY INVESTIGATION AND AUDITTING IN THIS BANK,I CAME ACROSS A VERY
HUGE SUM OF MONEY BELONGING TO A DECEASED PERSON WHO DIED ON JULY 2002
IN A PLANE CRASH AND THE FUND HAS BEEN DORMANT IN HIS ACCOUNT WITH THIS
BANK WITHOUT ANY CLAIM, EITHER FROM HIS FAMILY OR RELATIONS.THE SAID
AMOUNT IS U.S$1.5m(ONE MILLION FIVE HUNDRED THOUSAND DOLLARS).

MEANWHILE ALL THE WHOLE ARRANGEMENT TO PUT CLAIMS OVER THIS FUND AS THE
BONAFIDE NEXT OF KIN TO THE DECEASED,GET THE REQUIRED APPROVAL AND
TRANSFER THIS MONEY TO A FOREIGN ACCOUNT HAS BEEN PUT IN PLACE.THE
TRANSFER OF THIS FUND WILL REQUIRE A SECOND PARTY WHO WILL FORWARD CLAIMS AS
THE NEXT OF KIN TO THE BANK AND ALSO PRESENT A FOREIGN ACCOUNT WHERE THE
FUND WILL BE TRANSFERRED AFTER PAYMENT APPROVAL IS GRANTED.THE REQUEST
OF A FOREIGNER AS NEXT OF KIN IN THIS BUSINESS IS OCCASSIONED BY THE
FACT THAT THE CUSTOMER WAS A FOREIGNER AND A BURKINABE CANNOT STAND AS
NEXT OF KIN TO A FOREIGNER.

MOREOVER,I WILL NOT FAIL TO INFORM YOU THAT THIS TRANSACTION IS 100%
RISK FREE.YOU WILL BE ENTITLED TO 30% OF THE TOTAL SUM AS
GRATIFICATION,WHILE 10% WILL BE SET ASIDE TO TAKE CARE OF EXPENSES THAT MAY ARISE
DURING THE TIME OF TRANSFER,60% WILL BE FOR ME.I WILL BE MONITORING THE
WHOLE TRANSACTION HERE IN THIS BANK UNTIL YOU CONFIRM THE TOTAL FUND IN
YOUR ACCOUNT.CONTACT ME IMMEDIATELY IF YOU ARE INTRESTED AND CAPABLE TO
HANDLE THE TRANSACTION.

I AM URGENTLY WAITING FOR YOUR MAIL.
BEST REGARDS,
MR.YARO OJO.

Thanks Yaro. We salute you.

The Hek

I'm Going To Miami

The Hek's Super Playlist nears its second anniversary. As always, new entries are in red.

1. Kennedy Killed the Hat - Buck 65
2. I bought some books - Black Boot Trio
3. Watching the Wheels - John Lennon
4. Vacation - The Go-Go's
5. Like a Prayer - Madonna
6. Night Swimming - REM
7. Chicago - Sufjan Stevens
8. Ring, Ring - Abba
9. Call on Me - Eric Prydz
10. November Rain - Guns N Roses
11. Cruel Summer - Bannanarama
12. Hung up - Madonna
13. 463 - Buck 65
14. Judy is a Punk - The Ramones
15. The Laws have Changed - The New Pornographers
16. Portland, Oregon - Loretta Lynn feat. Jack White
17. Suzanne - Leonard Cohen
18. The Card Cheat - The Clash
19. Canadian Railroad Trilogy - Gordon Lightfoot
20. Boys in the Bright White Sports Car - Trooper
21. Mandy - Barry Manilow
22. Let's Get Together - Al Green
23. Mickey - Toni Basil
24. Bodies - Drowning Pool
25. Folson Prison Blues - Johnny Cash
26. Bawitaba - Kid Rock
27. Losing Grip - Avril Lavigne
28. City of New Orleans - Arlo Guthrie
29. Pump it - Black Eye Peas
30. Lonely Old Eyes - Neko Case
31. Immigrant Song - Led Zepplin
32. Philadelphia Freedom - Elton John
33. Don't Walk Away Eileen - Sam Roberts
34. Bring the Noise - Public Enemy & Anthrax
35. Maneater - Nelly Furtado
36. Gypsies, Tramps & Thieves - Cher
37. My Immortal - Evanescense
38. Hips Don't Lie - Shakira
39. Welcome to the Jungle - Guns and Roses
40. Bad Habit - The Offspring
41. LDN - Lily Allen
42. Man I use to Be - K-OS
43. Lolipop - Aqua
44. Banquet - Bloc Party
45. The Sign - Ace of Base
46. Rise Above - Black Flag
47. Devil Went Down to Georgia - Charlie Daniels Band
48. Thank God I'm a Country Boy - John Denver
49. Hello - Lionel Richie
50. River - Joni Mitchell
51. Romantic Rights - Death From Above 1979
52. Knock on Wood - Amy Stewart
53. My Heart Skips A Beat - Buck Owens
54. Levon - Elton John
55. Use It - The New Pornographers
56. The Boy In The Bubble - Paul Simon
57. Graceland - Paul Simon
58. Everywhere - Fleetwood Mac
59. Head Over Feet - Alanis Morrisette
60. Ring Of Fire - Johnny Cash
61. Inside And Out - Feist
62. Crosseyed And Painless - Talking Heads
63. Give It To Me - Timberland feat. Nelly Furtado and Justin Timberlake
64. Intervention - Arcade Fire
65. I'm Afraid Of Brittany Spears - LiveonRelease
66. For Whom The Bell Tolls - Metallica
67. Sundown - Gordon Lightfoot
68. Hard To Concentrate - Red Hot Chilli Peppers
69. Sabatoge - Beastie Boys
70. Diamonds From Sierra Leone - Kanye West
71. One Thing - Finger Eleven
72. Changes - 2pac
73. Gone Away - The Offspring
74. Harder, Better, Faster, Stronger - Daft Punk
75. 1234 - Feist
76. Relax, Take It Easy - Mika
77. God Save The Queen - The Sex Pistols
78. The Message - Grandmaster Flash and the Furious Five
79. Miami - Will Smith
80. Rebel Rebel - David Bowie
81. TV Party - Black Flag
82. Ballad of Peter Pumpkinhead - Crash Test Dummies

The Hek

Who Shot Stephanie?

My Mother loves to watch The Bold And The Beautiful.

Occasionally, I'll watch an episode or two.

I watched today's episode.

Oh man...

Stephanie Forrester got...

JACKED UP!!!!!

The Hek

SAVE_US_222

Last week, he was on The Hour promoting his new book.

This week, Chris Jericho returned to the WWE.


After a two-year hiatus, Y2J is stepping back into the ring. Once again, Jericho has given himself a great build up. For the last two months, these mysterious video's would show up on WWE television:



We all knew it was Y2J. What we all really wanted to know was if Vince McMahon was going to pull a fast one on us. Fortunately, in this case, Vince stuck with the original plan.

The Hek

Ugly Sunday

It was an ugly Sunday for Toronto's sports teams.

The Argos lost the East Division final. Next week's Grey Cup - which will take place at the Rogers Centre - will feature Winnipeg battling Saskatchewan. The Blue Bombers aren't even a true East Division team. They're only in the East because Ottawa folded. When there is a team in the Nation's Capital, Winnipeg moves back to the West.

I don't know what was worse: seeing the offense sputter, or watching Damon Allen on the sidelines, eating his guts out.

Regardless, no Argos = no Gery Cup sellout. Toronto is not a football town. It's sad, but true. And to think, some people want an NFL franchise. The NFL in Toronto would be a complete disaster. Not just for the NFL, but also for the CFL.

On top of that, the Raptors lost to Golden State. I'm having a tough time trying to figure them out. They're a "Jekyll and Hyde" team. You never know what team will show up on the court. No consistency = no success. Let's hope this is only temporary.

The Marlies were defeated by Rockford. Unfortunately, no one in Toronto cares about the Marlies. Do I even need to bring up the disastrous 2007 AHL All-Star game?

At least Toronto's Dwayne De Rosario had a nice Sunday.

The Hek

Spam Of The Week

My Audio Circus account gets a ton of spam-mail each week. Therefore, I thought I would highlight the effort people give just to extort you.

This one comes from Lindiwe Zuma:

Hello,

It is out of desperation I am sending you this email. I would like to
remain anonymous for now till I am able to trust your confidentiality
in
this matter.

My husband and I need your help to front for us as owners of funds that
are his which might come under investigation if the funds ownership is
not
changed soonest as my husband's finances are increasingly becoming the
source of investigation by our Detractors.

The source of this fund, which my husband’s earnings would not
validate,
will further sink him into the cesspool dug by our enemies. It is
because
of the dire situation we find ourselves that we resolve to reach you
and
ask for your assistance in this matter.

It is only customary in Africa when one occupies a high position like
my
husband did, to enjoy the privilege of being presented with
gratifications
sometimes through the award of contracts especially by companies that
came
into operation during his tenure. But due to the recent plot by our
detractors towards my husband, hence we immediately wish to move some
funds away that his income cannot account for and which came in form of
gratification while he was in office.

We are averse to letting those we know here in my country into this
transaction because we are no longer sure who our friends are. You will
be
handsomely rewarded if you choose to help us in partnership in this
deal.

I will be expecting to hear from you as soon as possible, and will
disclose further details to you upon your response. Do well not to
disclose the content of this mail to anyone please.

Best Regards,

Mrs. Lindiwe Zuma.

Thanks Lindiwe. We salute you.

The Hek

Your Thought Of The Day

I heard this on the Montel Williams Show. It's from a man named Troy Dunn.

"You can only find peace, after you find all the pieces."

The Hek

Your Stat Of The Day

10!

Ten needles of anesthetic were injected into my toe yesterday.

Yeah......fun, real fun.

The Hek

Mortal

My friend, Maayan, is presenting her first solo exhibition at York University's Eleanor Winters Art Gallery.

Titled "Mortal," the exhibition deals with various themes such as grief, femininity, eating disorders and body image, popular culture and the media.

Be sure to go out and support your local artists.


The Hek

Baal Teshuva

Here's my first-ever article from Afterword: Canada's Jewish Youth Magazine.

The Hek

Pure West

One of my favourite clips:



The Hek

Super Playlist: It's Been A While

1. Kennedy Killed the Hat - Buck 65
2. I bought some books - Black Boot Trio
3. Watching the Wheels - John Lennon
4. Vacation - The Go-Go's
5. Like a Prayer - Madonna
6. Night Swimming - REM
7. Chicago - Sufjan Stevens
8. Ring, Ring - Abba
9. Call on Me - Eric Prydz
10. November Rain - Guns N Roses
11. Cruel Summer - Bannanarama
12. Hung up - Madonna
13. 463 - Buck 65
14. Judy is a Punk - The Ramones
15. The Laws have Changed - The New Pornographers
16. Portland, Oregon - Loretta Lynn feat. Jack White
17. Suzanne - Leonard Cohen
18. The Card Cheat - The Clash
19. Canadian Railroad Trilogy - Gordon Lightfoot
20. Boys in the Bright White Sports Car - Trooper
21. Mandy - Barry Manilow
22. Let's Get Together - Al Green
23. Mickey - Toni Basil
24. Bodies - Drowning Pool
25. Folson Prison Blues - Johnny Cash
26. Bawitaba - Kid Rock
27. Losing Grip - Avril Lavigne
28. City of New Orleans - Arlo Guthrie
29. Pump it - Black Eye Peas
30. Lonely Old Eyes - Neko Case
31. Immigrant Song - Led Zepplin
32. Philadelphia Freedom - Elton John
33. Don't Walk Away Eileen - Sam Roberts
34. Bring the Noise - Public Enemy & Anthrax
35. Maneater - Nelly Furtado
36. Gypsies, Tramps & Thieves - Cher
37. My Immortal - Evanescense
38. Hips Don't Lie - Shakira
39. Welcome to the Jungle - Guns and Roses
40. Bad Habit - The Offspring
41. LDN - Lily Allen
42. Man I use to Be - K-OS
43. Lolipop - Aqua
44. Banquet - Bloc Party
45. The Sign - Ace of Base
46. Rise Above - Black Flag
47. Devil Went Down to Georgia - Charlie Daniels Band
48. Thank God I'm a Country Boy - John Denver
49. Hello - Lionel Richie
50. River - Joni Mitchell
51. Romantic Rights - Death From Above 1979
52. Knock on Wood - Amy Stewart
53. My Heart Skips A Beat - Buck Owens
54. Levon - Elton John
55. Use It - The New Pornographers
56. The Boy In The Bubble - Paul Simon
57. Graceland - Paul Simon
58. Everywhere - Fleetwood Mac
59. Head Over Feet - Alanis Morrisette
60. Ring Of Fire - Johnny Cash
61. Inside And Out - Feist
62. Crosseyed And Painless - Talking Heads
63. Give It To Me - Timberland feat. Nelly Furtado and Justin Timberlake
64. Intervention - Arcade Fire
65. I'm Afraid Of Brittany Spears - LiveonRelease
66. For Whom The Bell Tolls - Metallica
67. Sundown - Gordon Lightfoot
68. Hard To Concentrate - Red Hot Chilli Peppers
69. Sabatoge - Beastie Boys
70. Diamonds From Sierra Leone - Kanye West
71. One Thing - Finger Eleven
72. Changes - 2pac
73. Gone Away - The Offspring
74. Harder, Better, Faster, Stronger - Daft Punk
75. 1234 - Feist
76. Relax, Take It Easy - Mika
77. God Save The Queen - The Sex Pistols
78. The Message - Grandmaster Flash and the Furious Five

The Hek

*Catch Episode 60 of the Audio Circus*

New And Old

Episode 60 of the Audio Circus is now available!

This week: My attempt at explaining the difference between blu-ray and DVD.

To download, subscribe, or for more information, visit the show's website.

The Hek

Do They Know It's Halloween?

Okay, I know Halloween is finished, but I had to post this.

Yesterday on Q, Jian Ghomeshi played Do They Know It's Halloween, a parody of Do They Know It's Christmas. The song is preformed by the NORTH AMERICAN HALLOWEEN PREVENTION INITIATIVE, featuring artists such as Buck 65, Feist and members of the Arcade Fire.

Here's the song and video:



Enjoy,

The Hek

Final Thoughts: MLB Playoffs

There's really nothing left to say.

The Red Sox had a great regular-season. They were consistent and led the AL East with a few minor bumps along the way. They were stronger then the Rockies. No question about it. I am especially happy for Canadian Eric Gagne, as well as former Blue Jays Eric Hinske, Bobby Keilty, Royce Clayton (Yes, even Royce), and Mike Timlin.

Out of the seven playoff match-ups, I was correct on four of them. Total: 57%

On to more important matters....

LET'S GO RAPTORS!

The Hek

*Always a World Series winner: Episode 59 of the Audio Circus*

Life Lessons

Episode 59 of the Audio Circus is now available!

This week: My review of Into The Wild and music by Jesse David.

To download, subscribe, or for more information, visit the show's website.

The Hek

Rock Your Teeth Clean!

I WANT THIS!

The Hek

MLB Playoff Predictions - World Series

In the second round, I was right on one of the two match-ups. The one series I got right was not a perfect prediction.

On to the....

WORLD SERIES

Boston over Colorado in six games.

The Rockies have been on an amazing run. However, they have not played since last Monday. A long layoff like that kills momentum. Just look at what happened to the 2006 Tigers; and if you follow hockey, look at the 2004 Flames, the 2006 Oilers, and the 2007 Sens. All these teams advanced to the final after easily winning their semi-final matches. They had at least a week off before they played again. Meanwhile, their opponents took longer to get to the finals and had little rest. In the end, it was the opponents who came out on top.

The Red Sox last played on Sunday and are fresher then the Rockies. Boston will take advantage of this and by the time Colorado wins a game, it will be too late.

The Hek

*Catch Episode 58 of the Audio Circus*

Underground Sound

Episode 58 of the Audio Circus is now available.

This week: Sounds of the Subway; Music by Sex For Moderns.

To download, subscribe, or for more information, visit the show's website.

The Hek

Fellatrix?

Wow...

This is a very direct, professional, mature, and informative definition.

More information then you need to know?

The Hek

Jovi Punched!

I don't know why, but this is really funny.

Then again, I do have a twisted sense of humor.



The Hek

Rocktober

I don't know what the Colorado Rockies are on; but I want some!!!!!!




Congrats to the NL champs. Damn, I wish I didn't pick Arizona.

The Hek


*Catch Episode 57 of the Audio Circus*

Multiple Lovers

Episode 57 of the Audio Circus has been released!

This week's show features music by the Parkdale Revolutionary Orchestra.

To download, subscribe, or for more information, visit the show's website.

The Hek

Polkaroo & Jodie Run In Provincial Election

Here are two interesting post-election tidbits:

1. The Libertarian candidate for the riding of Toronto-Danforth was Mike Scott. You might think I'm referring to the Mike Scott who pitched for the Houston Astros in the 1980's; but I assure you, this is a different Mike Scott. This Mike Scott happens to be the man who wore the Polkaroo costume on TVO's Polka Dot Door. Don't believe me? Just read this article.

I had to see this with my own eyes, but when I got to the Libertarian office, I was told Mike Scott had left. Aw, I missed him again.


2. In the riding of Hamilton East-Stoney Creek, the Liberal candidate was Nerene Virgin, who played Jodie on Today's Special. It's unknown if Ms. Virgin had a mannequin who would come alive at night and dance around the campaign office.



You never know who might run in an election.

The Hek

15 Seconds?!

Wow......Global Television in Ontario just shot their load.

15 seconds after the polls closed, Global projected a Liberal Majority.

They're basing this on exit polls.

Meanwhile, everyone else is waiting for the real results come in before they make any statements.

Why do some news agencies feel it's better to be first then being accurate?

Just a thought.

The Hek

MLB Playoff Predictions - League Championship Series

In round one, I was right on two of the four match-ups. Out of the two, none were perfect predictions.

The four teams that have advanced won the first game and got on great rolls. When the division series is best three out of five games, there is no breathing room. You need to win first and quickly.

On to the next round:

American League Championship Series

Boston over Cleveland in six

National League Championship Series

Arizona over Colorado in six

The Hek

Late Night Art

Episode 56 of the Audio Circus is now available.

This week's episode features sounds from Nuit Blanche.

To download, subscribe or for more information, visit the show's website.

The Hek

Why I’m voting AGAINST the MMP system

On Oct. 10, the people of Ontario will choose whether to keep its current electoral system – the First Past The Post system – or choose a new system recommended by the Citizens Assembly – the Mixed Member Proportional system. Like many of you, I have received the little pamphlet from Elections Ontario, which explains how the two systems work. After reading the information carefully, I have come to the conclusion that the MMP system is a bad idea.

There are a number of reasons why voters should choose the existing system over the proposed MMP system. Here are mine in no particular order.

- With MMP, the number of seats in Queen’s Park will increase. Currently, there are 107 seats. With the MMP system, there would be 129 seats. Our tax dollars pay the salaries of the 107 Provincial Parliament Members (MPPs). If the MMP system goes into effect, our taxes will increase in order to cover the salaries of the additional 22 MPPs. More people in the Provincial legislature means more agendas and more gridlock. Bills will take longer to pass. The process of government will be slowed down. It’s a simple matter of having more pigs at a trough (No, I am not calling politicians pigs. I’m using the term as a figure of speech). There is already not enough resources for everyone and with more people, there will be even less. Do we really want our tax dollars to pay more salaries and then watch as the Government process gets even slower? I sure don’t.

- With MMP, the number of ridings in Ontario will decrease. Currently, there are 107 ridings. With the MMP system, there would only be 90. It’s already hard enough to establish a connection with your local member. The MMP system would ask us to vote for someone who might not even be from the surrounding area and won’t have a grasp on how things operate, but is representing us because of amalgamation. Merging certain ridings will only increase the population. It’s already hard enough trying to contact your local member when you have an estimated 200 interest groups and people trying to also get his or her attention. Try getting his or her attention when the riding is merged with another riding and having to compete with an estimated 400 interest groups and people.

- With MMP, there would be 90 local members and 39 list members. The list members are awarded seats in the legislature based on the “popular vote” (MMP allows you to vote twice; once for a local member candidate and once for a party). For example, if the Liberals received 46% of the popular vote, they would get about 17-18 seats out of the 39 available seats. Voting for a candidate and a party does seem nice and does give the impression of having a fair result. However, it’s a back-handed approach. In fact, being a list member in the provincial legislature would be a back-door approach. To be a local member, you would have to knock on doors, attend many events and festivals, shake lots of hands, debate with your fellow candidates, and spend a lot on signs and pamphlets. To be a list member, all you would have to do is be friends with lots of important figures, have a generous cheque book, give your opinion once in a while, and (possibly) be an expert in ass-kissing and brown-nosing. You wouldn’t even have to deal with constituents. If I was a local member, I would be pissed if I had to do all this hard work just to be elected and get a seat in the legislature, while the person next to me is a list member, and all he had to do to get a seat in the legislature was donate to the party and help the leader move some furniture. I realize that’s hypothetical, but not matter how you look at it, it’s still unfair.

- Sure, the MMP’s party vote allows fringe parties the chance to have a spot at Queen’s Park. Sure, it gives the impression that there might be a fairer result. However, voters would not choose the list members! The MMP system would allow us to choose how the 39 list member seats are divided up, but it doesn’t allow us to decide who gets to sit in those seats. List members are chosen only by the party. That’s not fair! We live in a democracy. Therefore, it is our right to choose who represents us and who runs our government. It should be that way with every political system in Canada *cough* Federally Elected Senate *cough*. This concept of list members is very similar to the Upper Canada Family Compact. Remember the Family Compact? It was a group of wealthy elites that chose from a group of other wealthy elites who would run the colony, completely ignoring the opinions of the majority of the colony’s population. It led to the 1837 rebellion. With the MMP system, list members would be a modern version of the Family Compact: elites choosing other elites, while ignoring the opinions of the people of Ontario.

- Yes, the MMP system gives the Green Party the chance of having representation in the legislature. I understand that. I would like to see the Green Party have an official voice. However, it would be wrong for the Greens to get seats through a back-door approach. If the Green Party wants to have a seat at Queen’s Park, they have to earn it. In order to earn it, they have to go out to every single riding with a candidate, meet people, shake hands, preach their policies, and be elected. The people should choose whether or not a Green Party candidate gets a seat in the legislature. Choosing the party but not getting to express which candidate represents the party is wrong.

- Popularity is a measurement that should have no value. It is also very subjective. What could be popular to me is unpopular to someone else. The Liberals might only be popular with a particular group. The Conservatives might only be popular with a different group. Just because something is popular does not necessarily mean it’s the right thing to choose. Pierre Trudeau was a popular Prime Minister, but it does not mean he was the best Prime Minister. Leonard Cohen is one of the best songwriters of all time, but it does not mean he’s one of the most popular songwriters. Brittany Spears is one of the most popular singers of all time, but it does not mean she’s the best singer. By having voters decide on a party - essentially deciding the most popular political party - the MMP system will lead to subjective results. It could also lead to the possibility of a party winning the most ridings, but losing an election because another party won fewer ridings but received more “party/popular votes.” That’s not fair. Something as subjective as popularity should not be considered when deciding something as important as the next Government. This is why we need to keep the existing First Past The Post system because it is objective. It spells everything out in black and white. The candidate with the most votes wins the riding. The party with the most ridings forms the Government.

- Numerous times I hear, “I like this candidate, but I don’t like the party he/she represents.” Hey, that happens. Sometimes, you have to choose a necessary evil. It would be unfair to penalize a strong candidate just because you do not like the candidate’s party. It is also unfair to vote for a candidate and then vote for a different party that goes against everything the candidate stands for. I hate to use clichés, but you can’t have your cake and eat it too.

I will be voting for our existing system. I admit, the First Past The Post system is not perfect. However, it is more stable then the MMP system. The MMP system will only lead to greater imperfections and a dangerous amount of subjectivity.

For more information on the Referendum, visit www.yourbigdecision.ca

On Oct. 10, please go out and vote.

The Hek

*Be sure to catch Episode 56 of the Audio Circus. This week's episode features sounds from Nuit Blanche*

All For One!

Having witnessed my first ever Toronto FC match from the stands of BMO Field yesterday (TFC defeated New York 2-1), I have come to the following conclusions:

1. Soccer fans are not like the fans who watch sports at the Rogers Centre and the Air Canada Centre. Soccer fans are a different breed.

2. Danny Dichio's tears cure cancer.

The Hek

MLB Playoff Predictions - Division Championship Series

American League

LA Angels over Boston in 4
Cleveland over NY Yankees in 5

National League

Arizona over Chicago in 5
Philadelphia over Colorado in 5

If the Angels and Diamondbacks get on solid rolls, look out.

The Hek

*Grand Slam: Episode 55 of the Audio Circus*

Baseball Roundup

Let's play ball! Episode 55 of the Audio Circus is now available.

This week, I review the Blue Jays' 2007 season.

To download, subscribe, or for more information, visit the show's website.

Next week: Sounds from Nuit Blanche

The Hek