Friday, December 29, 2006

Happy New Year

Being that this will be the last post for 2006, I thought I would take a moment to reflect on the past year.

2006 was a year of transition. I started the first four months in Ottawa, finishing off my degree. Following a standard summer, I entered September in a whole new realm, the real world. For the first time since I was a toddler, I wasn't spending most of my days in a classroom. It was and still remains a great feeling.

The real world also means finding a job in radio and this hasn't been an easy task. I've been very fortunate to still have the "non-radio job," so I am getting somewhat of a paycheck. I have also been fortunate to volunteer with CHEV radio. I'm not going to lie. I knew it would be a tough process trying to get a job in radio. However, I am quite aggravated with the lack of luck I have been experiencing. So far, I have applied to about 200 jobs. Out of all those applications, 20% have led to some sort of response; be it an interview or the "thanks, but no thanks" response. 0% have led to an actual paying job.

Back in April, I made a list of six things to do once I completed my studies at Carleton. They were:

1. Get Internet
2. Get a recording device
3. Get a (free) copy of editing software
4. Figure out how to podcast
5. Begin Freelancing
6. Get a CD Burner

So far, I have completed half of those tasks. I got the internet, found a great editing program, and not only figured how to podcast, but also started one. Getting a recording device is close to completion. Unfortunately, I can't really start to freelance until I have the recording device. Meanwhile, the CD burner will have to wait.

I've never been one to make resolutions. However, I am compelled make this one: In 2007, I plan to take charge and really pursue my goals.

There's an important to date to remember. It's December 31st, 2007. On this day, if I'm still in the same position I am right now, then I'm going to have to start taking some drastic measures.
I don't know what these measures will be. But believe me, they will be drastic. You might say they will be acts of desperation. Of course, this only happens if I don't keep my New Year's resolution.

Meanwhile, have a safe and Happy New Year.

The Hek

PS - Next post will be on Jan. 2nd

Thursday, December 28, 2006

Musings Of A Random Nature

Spike Lee to Direct Film About James Brown

That was quick. Although the film company says the deal was already in the works before Brown's passing. Now the question is, who will star as the "Godfather of Soul?" My money is on Cuba Gooding Jr.


Barry Zito reaches agreement with Giants

Not bad if you're a fan of the San Francisco Giants. Sure, they lose Shea 'Sinking Ship' Hillenbrand to the Angels. However, they pick up Barry Zito; the most coveted free agent on the market this season. Just another pitcher the Blue Jays failed to get. Then again, Toronto didn't have the money Zito was asking for. The Jays still need another starter.


Winter Storm hits Israel

Global warming can't be that bad. It only put the snow somewhere else.


Sheila Carter is back. Looks like she had some plastic surgery. Now, she has a striking resemblance to Phyllis Newman. That cannot be good.

The Hek

Wednesday, December 27, 2006

Strombo vs. Caine

Have to give props to Omni Television.

The station (Omni 1 to be exact) is airing Kung Fu: The Legend Continues, every Tuesday and Wednesday at 11:00pm. Last night, I was originally going to watch The Hour. But I'm sorry. George Strombonopolis vs. David Carradine? It's no contest. Master Caine will win every time.

The best part is that Kung Fu also airs on Wednesdays and Thursdays, at 11:00am and 1:00pm.

The Hek

- Be sure to catch Episode Twenty-two of The Audio Circus -

Tuesday, December 26, 2006

Secret Desires. Forbidden Magic. Intriguing Mystery. Limitless Passion.

Does anyone happen to watch the program, Passions?

I managed to catch the last segment of today's episode. To put it simply, it was insane. You had three scenes, each providing a different genre. Instead of changing an emotional tone through a nice flow, this program changes it's tone drastically and without any warning. Here's what happened:

Scene one. Louis, a local police officer, is consoling a female cadet who is in the hospital after being attacked and raped. The cadet was starting to have flashbacks and was bawling into Louis' chest. She begged him to not ask anymore questions about the incident. Louis promises he will find the men that attacked the cadet, who he is also in love with. A very dramatic scene.

Scene two. Two women are trying to kill a witch named Tabatha. There's a huge chase, but in the end, Tabatha ties up her attackers and banishes them to a dark spiritual world. The scene is right out of a Bugs Bunny cartoon; full of sound effects, fumbles and a mangled up pecan pie. A very comedic scene. In fact, it was a farce.

Scene three. The body of a murdered transvestite is discovered inside a wedding cake, as the newly married couple cuts the cake in front of all their guests. A scene with suspense and mystery. The best line came from the bride who exclaimed, "Oh my God! There's a dead transvestite in my wedding cake!"

I bet you wouldn't see something like that on Days Of Our Lives.

The Hek

- Check out Episode 22 of The Audio Circus -

Friday, December 22, 2006

Holiday Spirit

Just got back from the Waxers game.

Markham beat the Toronto Jr. A Canadiens, 4-0. Waxers' Goalie Matthew Spezza picked up the shutout; and yes, he's Jason Spezza's brother. Speaking of which, why is it that the two players I have from the Ottawa Senators (Spezza and Wade Redden) are both injured and unable to contribute to my Yahoo Fantasy team? The Sens are having a brutal season. Things are getting ugly in Hockey Country.

As always, my job at the game was to keep an eye on Slapshot the Bear. I'm happy to report that once again, he was a well behaved mascot.

Anyway, I just wanted to take this time to wish everyone a very Merry Christmas. I hope everyone has a great time with their families. Enjoy the presents but most importantly, enjoy the moment.

Now, For the Politically Correct (props to Blake):

Please accept with no obligation, implied or implicit, my best wishes for an environmentally conscious, socially responsible, low-stress, non-addictive, gender-neutral celebration of the winter solstice holiday, practiced within the most enjoyable traditions of the religious persuasion of your choice, or secular practices of your choice, with respect for the religious/secular persuasion and/or traditions of others, or their choice not to practice religious or secular traditions at all. I also wish you a fiscally successful, personally fulfilling and medically uncomplicated recognition of the onset of the generally accepted calendar year 2007, but not without due respect for the calendars of choice of other cultures whose contributions to society have helped make America great. Not to imply that America is necessarily greater than any other country nor the only America in the Western Hemisphere. Also, this wish is made without regard to the race, creed, color, age, physical ability, religious faith or sexual preference of the wishee.

By accepting these greetings, you are accepting the aforementioned terms as stated. This greeting is not subject to clarification or withdrawal. It is freely transferable with no alteration to the original greeting. It implies no promise by the wisher to actually implement any of the wishes for herself/himself/others, and is void where prohibited by law and is revocable at the sole discretion of the wisher. This wish is warranted to perform as expected within the usual application of good tidings for a period of one year or until the issuance of a subsequent holiday greeting, whichever comes first, and warranty is limited to replacement of this wish or issuance of a new wish at the sole discretion of the wisher.

The Hek

PS - next post will be on Dec. 26th

Thursday, December 21, 2006

Green Christmas

Right now in Toronto, there is no snow.

This has become a hot button issue in the city. Many people are upset at the possibility that there will be no sign of the white stuff come Christmas morning. Barring a sudden major snowfall, it looks like it will be a "Green Christmas." Personally, I have no problem with this.

Just because there might not be snow, doesn't mean that Christmas is ruined. Think of it as Christmas in a warmer climate like California, Florida, Texas, or Alabama. Okay, maybe Toronto is not as warm as those places in December; but still, they manage to celebrate with no snow. Besides, this wouldn't be the first time Toronto has had a Green Christmas.

On December 25th, 1982, the temperature was 17'C (the mark of El Nino). In 1994, it was about 10'C and the snow was completely melted. In fact, my friends and I played road hockey all day. It was great.

Let's also not forget what snow can lead to. Driving becomes a little more dangerous, you have to go out and shovel, or be at the mercy of a snow removal service; and, the chance of slipping on ice becomes less likely to happen.

So cheer up, Toronto. It's going to be a great holiday. With or without snow.

The Hek

Wednesday, December 20, 2006

The Fun Of Wikipedia

Does anyone else get addicted to Wikipedia?

I find myself going on there and looking up random things. Yesterday for example, I looked up the following: Nicole Richie, Tod Maffin, Allen Iverson, Joni Mitchell, Washington Wizards, and Kenny Dykstra.

Now I've gotten into editing.

For instance, the page on CHEV radio had little information. Look what I have done to it now.

Too bad I couldn't use this as a scholarly source. Then again, if people like me can just simply edit anything, it's accuracy might have to be called into question.

The Hek

Tuesday, December 19, 2006

Wish I Had A River: The Hek's Super Playlist

The latest, the greatest.

1. Kennedy Killed the Hat - Buck 65
2. I bought some books - Black Boot Trio
3. Watching the Wheels - John Lennon
4. Vacation - The Go-Go's
5. Like a Prayer - Madonna
6. Night Swimming - REM
7. Chicago - Sufjan Stevens
8. Ring, Ring - Abba
9. Call on Me - Eric Prydz
10. November Rain - Guns N Roses
11. Cruel Summer - Bannanarama
12. Hung up - Madonna
13. 463 - Buck 65
14. Judy is a Punk - The Ramones
15. The Laws have Changed - The New Pornographers
16. Portland, Oregon - Loretta Lynn feat. Jack White
17. Suzanne - Leonard Cohen
18. The Card Cheat - The Clash
19. Canadian Railroad Trilogy - Gordon Lightfoot
20. Boys in the Bright White Sports Car - Trooper
21. Mandy - Barry Manilow
22. Let's Get Together - Al Green
23. Mickey - Toni Basil
24. Bodies - Drowning Pool
25. Folson Prison Blues - Johnny Cash
26. Bawitaba - Kid Rock
27. Losing Grip - Avril Lavigne
28. City of New Orleans - Arlo Guthrie
29. Pump it - Black Eye Peas
30. Lonely Old Eyes - Neko Case
31. Immigrant Song - Led Zepplin
32. Philadelphia Freedom - Elton John
33. Don't Walk Away Eileen - Sam Roberts
34. Bring the Noise - Public Enemy & Anthrax
35. Maneater - Nelly Furtado
36. Gypsies, Tramps & Thieves - Cher
37. My Immortal - Evanescense
38. Hips Don't Lie - Shakira
39. Welcome to the Jungle - Guns and Roses
40. Bad Habit - The Offspring
41. LDN - Lily Allen
42. Man I use to Be - K-OS
43. Lolipop - Aqua
44. Banquet - Bloc Party
45. The Sign - Ace of Base
46. Rise Above - Black Flag
47. Devil Went Down to Georgia - Charlie Daniels Band
48. Thank God I'm a Country Boy - John Denver
49. Hello - Lionel Richie
50. River - Joni Mitchell
51. Romantic Rights - Death From Above 1979

The Hek

- Check out Episode Twenty-One of The Audio Circus -

Monday, December 18, 2006

The Hek: Time Magazine's 'Person of The Year'

Time Magazine has announced that this year's 'Person Of The Year' is being awarded to anyone who uses or creates content on the internet. Therefore, yours truly is the recipient of this noble and historic award............along with a lot of other people. But, who am I to ruin a great achievement.

On to my acceptance speech:

What a truly wonderful moment this is to be named co-recipient of Time's 'Person Of The Year' award. There are so many people who have been given this title, and to be included with them is a great honour.

First, I would like to thank all the readers and listeners. Without your support, there would be no blog and no podcast. Second, I want to thank my parents for giving me proper guidance, teaching me that if you want something, you have to work for it; and most importantly, conceiving me.

Have to thank all my former girlfriends for giving me strength and major booty (Okay, I stole that from Kevin Smith). Thank you to all my friends. You guys are great! I love you all!

Gotta thank Lionel Richie. His song "Hello" has been stuck in my head all day. It's a great song. I really appreciate it. Thanks Lionel!

Thank you to my family, my co-workers, and all my teachers. I hope I didn't forget anyone. If I did I'm really sorry. I know I'm running out of time so, let me just say, God bless you all; have your pets spayed or nuked or whatever; and, have great night! Thank you!

The Hek

*It's back! The Audio Circus podcast. Catch Episode 21, ASAP*

Friday, December 15, 2006

Happy Hanukkah!

Four years ago at this time, I was living in a residence building on the grounds of Carleton University. It was my first Hanukkah away from home. I wanted to celebrate, but residents were not allowed to light candles in the building. Like the film Collateral, I had to adapt, change, improvise and roll with it.

I'm not sure who suggested the idea. I simply took a piece of paper and drew a monarah. Then, I took an orange marker and drew the shamesh candle as well as the first candle. Each night before dinner, I would say a little prayer and draw on a new candle. It might not have been the proper way to celebrate the holiday, but I felt pretty good about what I had done.

I am not a religious person. However, there are certain things I have to do.

Wishing everyone a Happy and Healthy Hanukkah.

The Hek

Thursday, December 14, 2006

Good Day, Mr. Kubrick

When Stanley Kubrick began filming Full Metal Jacket, he placed ads in numerous newspapers across the U.S., seeking young aspiring actors. If you wanted a role, all you had to do was audition by sending a VHS of yourself doing a monologue. Here is an example of one such audition.

Consider this as, "what not to do during your audition." However, you have to give the guy credit for having the stones to do this.

The Hek

Wednesday, December 13, 2006

If You're Board And You Know It, Write Haiku

Gifts packaged for lovers
during a blissful holiday
with no snow

Just a reminder: The Audio Circus will return this Sunday. According to my friend Corina, the show has hit the South American market. In fact, it's being used to teach youth groups about radio. Now that's cool.

The Hek

Tuesday, December 12, 2006

Oh Those Rich Girls

Nicole Richie was arrested for driving under the influence.

It seems that whenever people like Ms. Richie are in the news, it's for incidents which are more enhanced, then if a regular human being were to take part in a similar incident. When a regular person is pulled over for DUI, it's because the vehicle is swerving and its a threat on the road. The guilty party is then arrested because he or she has a high level of alcohol in their bloodstream. However, Nicole Richie takes it to the next level.

Not only was her SUV swerving, but she was also driving the wrong way on a freeway in California. Along with that, Richie didn't have alcohol in her system but instead, a combination of pot and Vicadin. I should also point out that this is the second time that Richie has been arrested in connection with narcotics. In 2003, she was charged (although the case was eventually dropped) for possession of Heroin.

Call me crazy, but I think Nicole Richie has a drug problem.

The best line I have heard was from a co-worker's brother, who said that when police called Nicole's parents to inform them that their daughter was arrested, her father picked up the phone and said, "Hello, is it me you're looking for?"

The Hek

Monday, December 11, 2006

Trying To Make A Difference

My father recently told me that my room was a "dump."

I disagreed, stating that I have lots of things and no where to put them. I also argued that my room is a temporary residence and eventually, I'll be moving out. Therefore, lots of things are left out and in neat piles, to make it easier to eventually gather and pack. My dad had no problem with this, but then suggested that at least 50% of all the objects in my room, can be thrown out.

I agreed with my father's ladder notion. There are lots of things in my room that I really don't need and have no use for. However, there are some useless objects that I just can't throw out like a candy wrapper.

I'm talking about most of the books in my room. I have children's books, course packs, magazines, and a number of books on random topics. I'm going to keep some of them, but there are some books I want to get rid of. I have no problem getting rid of them. It's just that I don't want to throw them out because they cost money, and even though I have no use for them, someone else might. So, here's my question to you:

Besides the library and Goodwill, is there a charity/organization where I can donate/give away (maybe get a little coin in return) all the books I don't need? I'd feel better giving them away then throwing them into the garbage.

The Hek

Friday, December 08, 2006

Can You Do That 'Chung-Chung' Thing Again?

When it comes to police dramas, there is only one program I'll watch: Law and Order. Actually make that three programs: Law and Order, Law and Order - Special Victims Unit, and Law and Order - Criminal Intent.

In fact, here's my ultimate L&O team:

Detectives - Lennie Briscoe, Robert Goren (CI), Lt. Anita Van Buren
ADAs - Jack McCoy, Casey Novak (SVU)

I'd love to see your L&O teams. Feel free to post them in the comments section. Meanwhile, here's a new L&O series, the Special Letters Unit.

The Hek

Thursday, December 07, 2006

Haiku Hek Returns!

vengeful cold weather
making its appearance
on the exposed ground

The Hek

Wednesday, December 06, 2006

Life In The 'Titanic' Division

Thank God the Raptors play in the weakest division of the NBA.

Here are the standings, as of 7:32pm EST, of the Atlantic division; or, as some have called it: the Titanic division.

New Jersey 7 10 0.412 0.0 6-3 3-0 4-5 3-5 3-7 L 1
Toronto 7 10 0.412 0.0 6-3 3-1 5-2 2-8 5-5 W 2
New York 7 13 0.350 1.5 4-8 1-2 2-7 5-6 3-7 W 1
Boston 5 11 0.313 1.5 4-9 1-3 3-6 2-5 4-6 L 3
Philadelphia 5 11 0.313 1.5 4-7 0-2 3-3 2-8 2-8 L 4

That's right. The Raptors are tied for first place with more defeats then wins. If they played in the Central division, they would be 6th out of seven teams. In the Southeast, they would be tied for third. Those are just the divisions in the Eastern Conference. If it was the Western Conference, the Raps would be right at the bottom.

Toronto had a slow start but, they have started to look like the team fans were hoping to see. If they keep it up, you can expect them to finish no higher then sixth and no lower then 10th in the Eastern conference. Right now, they're in 8th which gives them the last playoff spot. I won't be surprised if they rise in the rankings as well. They appear to be stronger then their opponents in the conference and division.

Things are looking good in Raptorland.

The Hek

Tuesday, December 05, 2006

WWE Fires Paul Heyman

The WWE has never liked anything they didn't create. This theory has once again proven itself with the departure of Paul Heyman.

Following a somewhat lackluster December to Dismember pay-per-view, WWE officials informed Heyman that they were letting him go. Their reasoning was that Vince McMahon was dissatisfied with Heyman's involvement with the ECW brand. McMahon felt that Heyman was holding on to the past instead of embracing the "new vision" of ECW (also known as the WWE version of ECW).

You cannot have ECW without Paul Heyman. He created the organization and therefore, Heyman is ECW. It was his vision that led the brand to acquire it's cult status during the late 1990's. It must have killed Heyman to only be a consultant and not take part in the booking and writing, when WWE resurrected the brand earlier this year. Watching the new ECW, you can notice the heavy WWE influence. This is especially the case with the old ECW stars (Dreamer, Sandman, Guido, Sabu, etc), who are made to look very weak and easily dominated by the WWE-trained talent (C.M. Punk, Mike Knox, Kevin Thorn, Test, etc).

I cannot understand why the WWE is afraid of letting Paul Heyman play a major role in the script writing. When he was the head writer for Smackdown, the program was at its best. There's also the great work he's done with WWE's developmental territory, Ohio Valley Wrestling.

Heyman knows how to put over talent. He would have made stars out of the new talent, as well as making sure that the old ECW stars, were made to look strong and have the same presence as they did in the past.

Once again, Vince McMahon's ego has got in the way of the product. This is what happens when you have a monopoly and lack the threat of serious competition. Hopefully, organizations like TNA and Ring Of Honor will hire Heyman and give him full control. In order to compete successfully with WWE, Paul Heyman is a crucial element to have.

The Hek

Monday, December 04, 2006

Stephane Dion: A Good Choice

Personally, I felt the Liberal convention was compelling television. I truly believe that no one could have predicted the result. Not only is Stephane Dion the right man to lead the Grits, he is also proof that just because someone with a "name" enters the race, it does not mean that they automatically go to the front of the line.

By "name," I am referring to people like Michael Ignatiff and Bob Rae.

Iggy and Rae are known as "star candidates;" well-known citizens who parachute into a political party, with the hopes that there name and reputation outside their particular party, will be enough for them to become the leader. What these star candidates do, is step in front of all the other members who have been with the party for years and are more deserving and even a better choice for the leadership. This has occurred with all of Canada's political parties and it is not fair.

I am a firm believer that people who deserve success are the ones that work for it. In other words, they are the ones who "pay their dues." Stephen Harper didn't just show up and become the Prime Minister. He had to work for it. He first ran for parliament in 1988 and over the next 18 years, he worked as an MP as well as an expert behind the scenes. He built up a reputation and ultimately became leader of the Conservatives and the PM. The same can be said about Jean Chretien. He was first elected to parliament in the early 1960's. For thirty years, he built up a reputation and all that hardwork paid off when he led the Liberals to victory in the 1993 election. In fact, every Canadian Prime Minister of the last sixty years (with the exception of a couple), started off sitting in the back rows of the House of Commons and eventually moved up. They all paid their dues before moving into 24 Sussex.

If I was Stephan Dion, I would be insulted that despite everything I have done for my party during the past ten years, that same party would rather choose someone who has either a.) no experience in politics and has lived outside of Canada for quite some time; or b.) has lots of experience in provincial and federal politics, but with a completely different party. If such a thing were to happen, Dion would probably relate to Lorne Nystrom.

Nystrom was an NDP MP from 1968 to 1993 and again from 1997 to 2004. In 2003 he ran for the leadership of the NDP. I attended one of the contenders debates and to me, Nystrom was perfect for the job. He was intelligent, eloquent, down to earth and cared about his country. Unfortunately, his party chose to elect someone who had never sat in the House of Commons and whose only experience was that of city council.

Don't get my wrong, Ignatiff and Rae would probably be good leaders. However, if they want to lead they should first spend some time as MPs in order to get a feeling of how things work and build up their reputations on Parliament Hill.

So congratulations to Stephane Dion. He has certainly earned his spot. Of course, his challenge now would be to defeat the Harper Government and that, will be no easy task.

The Hek

Friday, December 01, 2006

I'm Here To Chew Bubblegum

The Liberal leadership convention is well underway in Montreal. By Saturday night, a new leader will be chosen. I feel it's all going to come down to how many supporters Mike Ignatiff and Bob Rae can scoop up with each passing round of voting. No matter who wins the leadership, he or she cannot compare to the one known as Hot Rod.

Why Roddy Piper should run for the leadership of the Liberal party;
Reason #4: Roddy Piper is straight to the point, with soundbites that would make even the most experienced political pundit drool.

The Hek

Thursday, November 30, 2006

Fill In The Blanks! (All the cool kids do it)

1. The best film of 2006 was:_______________

2. The next leader of the Liberal party will be:________________

3. I will spend _______ on holiday gifts.

4. I _______ Lindsay Lohan.

5. My favourite type of Oreo cookie is:____________

6. Carmen Mesta was murdered by:____________

7. U2 is a _______ rock band.

8. Right now, I am wearing:__________

9. The best player on the Toronto Raptors is:_________

10 . If I could be an animal, I would be a:_____________

***Check out the Carleton Improv Association's next show: Friday, December 1st, 7pm at Rooster's Coffee House (4th floor University Centre, Carleton University) in Ottawa. It's FREE (I think)***

The Hek

Wednesday, November 29, 2006

If You Told Me I Was Insane, I'd Say 'Thank You'

Roddy Piper has announced that he has been diagnosed with lymphoma cancer. However, being the legend that he is, the King of Kilt is already promising that he's going to beat it.

Get well, Hot Rod! We're all rooting for you.

And now....

Why Roddy Piper should run for the leadership of the Liberal party;
Reason #3: Roddy Piper will allow nothing to stand between him and the issues.

The Hek

Tuesday, November 28, 2006

Three Years And Still Going Strong

It was three years ago today, when I started this blog.

It isn't just three years of "And Now, A Word From The Hek." It's three years since discovering the medium of blogging, at a time when it was just coming out of its infancy and starting to be recognized by many media institutions, as a new source for promotion and content.

In the beginning, it was just myself and my friend Tim (Rugby's Inklings), who would actually spend time posting our thoughts for everyone on the Information Super Highway to see. Since then, many of my friends and colleagues have started up their own blogs; including those who said that they would never keep a blog, nor read them.

This was an important year for my blog. In the last 12 months I have used it not only as a journal, but also as a media outlet. The ladder is especially important as I continue to break into the world of broadcasting and journalism. In the past year, I've also added title fields, RSS feeds, links to other sites and some cool graphics. The blog has also been a venue for me to launch my podcast as well as CHEV Radio's blogs.

To everyone who has come to this website whether it was once, or constantly since day one, I thank you. Thank you for your comments. Thank you for your encouragement. Thank you for reading.

And now, here is what the first post looked liked back in 2003. Unfortunately, Blogger no longer carries the original template; so, you're only getting the content and not the actual look. Oh well.

The Hek

- Check out Episode Twenty of the Audio Circus podcast -

Monday, November 27, 2006

365 Days, 48 Songs: The Hek's Super Playlist

I started this one year ago and it's still going strong. The best of the best; the finest of the fine (subjectively, of course). As always new entries are in the red.

1. Kennedy Killed the Hat - Buck 65
2. I bought some books - Black Boot Trio
3. Watching the Wheels - John Lennon
4. Vacation - The Go-Go's
5. Like a Prayer - Madonna
6. Night Swimming - REM
7. Chicago - Sufjan Stevens
8. Ring, Ring - Abba
9. Call on Me - Eric Prydz
10. November Rain - Guns N Roses
11. Cruel Summer - Bannanarama
12. Hung up - Madonna
13. 463 - Buck 65
14. Judy is a Punk - The Ramones
15. The Laws have Changed - The New Pornographers
16. Portland, Oregon - Loretta Lynn feat. Jack White
17. Suzanne - Leonard Cohen
18. The Card Cheat - The Clash
19. Canadian Railroad Trilogy - Gordon Lightfoot
20. Boys in the Bright White Sports Car - Trooper
21. Mandy - Barry Manilow
22. Let's Get Together - Al Green
23. Mickey - Toni Basil
24. Bodies - Drowning Pool
25. Folson Prison Blues - Johnny Cash
26. Bawitaba - Kid Rock
27. Losing Grip - Avril Lavigne
28. City of New Orleans - Arlo Guthrie
29. Pump it - Black Eye Peas
30. Lonely Old Eyes - Neko Case
31. Immigrant Song - Led Zepplin
32. Philadelphia Freedom - Elton John
33. Don't Walk Away Eileen - Sam Roberts
34. Bring the Noise - Public Enemy & Anthrax
35. Maneater - Nelly Furtado
36. Gypsies, Tramps & Thieves - Cher
37. My Immortal - Evanescense
38. Hips Don't Lie - Shakira
39. Welcome to the Jungle - Guns and Roses
40. Bad Habit - The Offspring
41. LDN - Lily Allen
42. Man I use to Be - K-OS
43. Lolipop - Aqua
44. Banquet - Bloc Party
45. The Sign - Ace of Base
46. Rise Above - Black Flag
47. Devil Went Down to Georgia - Charlie Daniels Band
48. Thank God I'm a Country Boy - John Denver

The Hek

- Like those songs? You'll like this too: Episode 20 of the Audio Circus -

Friday, November 24, 2006

Penguins Should Not Mess With Polar Bears

Well, the weekend is here and I'm off to keep Slapshot some company at tonight's Markham Waxers' game. In the meantime:

Why Roddy Piper should run for the leadership of the Liberal party;
Reason #2: Roddy Piper is capable of handling trade relations with foreign partners.

The Hek

Thursday, November 23, 2006

Get Some Shots Of The Body

My phone rings and I get excited. When I pick up the phone I hear this awkward pause. It is then that I realize that someone is about to mispronounce my name and try to sell me something.

On many occasions, I have been tempted to mess with a telemarketer's mind. Unfortunately, my conscience convinces me not to.

Fortunately, there are people like Tom Mabe, who give into this type of temptation.

For your listening pleasure: How to prank a telemarketer.

The Hek

Wednesday, November 22, 2006

I Don't Die, I Just Multiply!

In ten days, the Liberal Party of Canada will be choosing a new leader. This will take place at a convention in Montreal. There's eight candidates and each one of them are deserving of the job. Some are former provincial Premiers (Bob Rae), some are former NHL legends (Ken Dryden), some have been with the party for a long time (Stephane Dion), and some just showed up one day (Michaell Ignatieff). However, there is only one person who I feel can truly lead the Liberals.

That person, is Roddy Piper.

Roddy Piper is a fine, upstanding citizen, and will no doubt, bring integrity back the Grits. Having said that, I present:

Why Roddy Piper should run for the leadership of the Liberal Party; Reason #1: Roddy Piper believess in multiculturalism.

The Hek

Tuesday, November 21, 2006

Carleton University President Quits

A very interesting storyline has emerged from my Alma Mater.

David Atkinson, after only 15 months on the job, has resigned as the President of Carleton. The news has shocked many people in the Carleton community. Many students felt that he was doing an adequate job. Although he didn't always agree with the Student Councils, he still maintained a line of communication.

His reason for leaving his post has been kept very quiet. It looks as though he was "forced" to resign. The press release stated that the Board of Governors and Dr. Atkinson had a difference of opinion in regards to the University's vision of the future. I have a feeling that this all relates to Dr. Atkinson's campaign against Macleans Magazine and the Ottawa Citizen.

Carleton was one of the schools that refused to submit information for Macleans' yearly University rankings. Regardless, Macleans still released the rankings for all schools and Carleton, did not place well. This prompted the Citizen to run an article using the term "Last Chance U" in the headline. For those that don't know, "Last Chance U" is a stereotype (and it's completely false in my opinion) that is used to describe Carleton. It suggests that Carleton sets its entrance requirements really low so that students who barley got by in High School, can attend University when they would have been turned down by other post-secondary institutions. Dr. Atkinson was quite upset with the content of the article and began a campaign where he urged all students, faculty and alumni to contact the Citizen and voice their displeasure.

It's possible that certain members on the Board as well as the faculty felt that Atkinson, was too aggressive in this campaign and may have hurt Carleton's reputation. Although I don't have this information, it's also possible that there are certain financial donors who are involved with CanWest, the company that owns the Citizen, who threatened to withdraw their donations if Dr. Atkinson was not disciplined for his actions.

There are parts to this story that are being left out. Needless to say, the Carleton community has to once again, find a new President. It's going to be a long process especially after what's happened.

The Hek

-Check out Episode Nineteen of the Audio Circus-

Monday, November 20, 2006

Two Pictures Worth 2000 Words

Some great photos to kick off your week, from the Canadian Press.

Photo Number One:

Harper, Putin and Bush wear traditional Vietnamese clothing. Call me crazy, but I don't think they're taking this seriously. Boys, it's not a pajama party.

Photo Number Two:

Congratulations to the BC Lions; 2006 Grey Cup Champions. What better way to celebrate then by breaking the trophy into two pieces. Um....guys, that trophy has been around since 1909. You might want to be gentle with that. Nothing a little duct tape can't fix.

The Hek

- Be sure to check out Episode Nineteen of the Audio Circus -

Friday, November 17, 2006

Take That, Paul Hewson!

Hats off to the fan in the front row at a U2 concert. From and

Bono is at a U2 concert in Glasgow when he asks the audience for some quiet. In the silence, he starts to slowly clap his hands.
Holding the audience in total silence, he says softly and seriously into the microphone, "Every time I clap my hands, a child in Africa dies." A voice from near the front pierces the silence: Well, f**ken' stop doin' it then! ”

The Hek

PS: I've added two new blogs to the links section; A Pathological Doodler & The Monkey's Closet.

Thursday, November 16, 2006

The Big Hurt; Or, How The Hek Nearly Fell Off His Chair

When I found out that the Blue Jays are on the verge of signing Frank Thomas, a number of things happened to me. First, there was a massive rush of blood to my head. I became dazed and almost fell off my chair. I had to grip the sides to maintain balance. Then, I felt overwhelmed and had to leave my room for a bit. When I came back, I thought I was dreaming; so, I pinched myself. Turns out I wasn't dreaming.

Baring a sudden turn of events, Frank Thomas is going to join the Jays for $20 Million over the next 2-3 years. Thomas is a flat out power hitter. That's all he can do. He will no doubt fill the role of designated hitter. However, the more I think about it, the more hesitant I feel about him being part of the Jays.

Don't get me wrong, Frank Thomas would be a great addition for Toronto. I want it to happen. It's just that $20 Million is way too much to spend for him. If this was 1993-94 when Thomas was tearing up the league, then $20 Million would have been appropriate. But it's 2006 and up until this past season, Thomas was plagued with injuries. He's slow on the base paths and he can't even field anymore. This year with the Athletics, Thomas made an amazing comeback. As Oakland's DH he hit 39 homeruns and knocked in 114 RBIs. What's important to note is that Thomas only earned $500,000. Obviously, he deserves a raise; but $20 Million is excessive. If I was the general manager, I would have only offered him $5-8 Million over two years.

Frank Thomas is a big gamble. He could get injured again and for all we know, what he did in 2006, could have been just a fluke. If it's August and he's hitting .150, heads are going to roll.

The Blue Jays should not waste all their money on hitters. It would be great to have Thomas but, they already have a solid group of hitters. The Jays should use the majority of their spending money on pitching.

In the end, pitching wins baseball games. Toronto is just one decent starter away from making the playoffs. That's all they need (as long as none of the starters suffer too many injuries like they did this past season). Spending $20 Million on a good hitter is not going to get the Jays to the post-season. Spending money on a high caliber pitcher will.

I just hope the Blue Jays do not suffer the same fate as the Raptors did when they brought in Hakeem Olawjiwan. I still have nightmares about that.

The Hek

Wednesday, November 15, 2006

I'm Going Through Changes

I'm making some small changes to the blog.

I've created a new section called "The Hek's Projects." This will provide links to all the things I'm working on when I'm not sitting at my computer, working out at the gym, or watching wrestling.

Speaking about projects, I've created two blogs for CHEV radio. The first one is called CHEV Radio Hearsay and it's a way for listeners to get to know the people who work at the station. The second one is called CHEV Radio Community Listings and it's a billboard of events occurring in Markham and the surrounding York Region.

As always, there is the links section where you can read whatever is on the minds of my friends. Except for Starback. She doesn't want to share her writing talents anymore :-(

The Hek
does this work

Tuesday, November 14, 2006

Don't &$!% With Garth Turner!

Wow, that's the second straight post where I have "sworn" in the title.

Garth Turner has turned into somewhat of a renegade on parliament Hill. I never would have expected this from him. He's such a clean-cut guy. Remember, this guy was a cabinet minister for Brian Mulroney and even ran for the country's top job in 1993; losing of course, to Kim Campbell. He was also the Business Commentator on CFTO news for a number of years.

Obviously, there was a lot we didn't know about the man.

What's intriguing about Turner is that he seems to be the only MP who has taken advantage of the popular forms of "new media." That being blogging and podcasting.

If you go to his site (just click on this post's title), you get to read his thoughts and feelings about the Government, his troubles with certain Conservatives, and any speeches or press releases he has released. He also puts together a program in the form of a video podcast. MPTV is not just about him and his views on the issues. Turner also uses it to interview MPs on both sides of the House. It's a unique perspective about what goes on in the House of Commons. It's certainly the main reason as to why he was kicked out of the Conservative party.

Obviously, Turner has an axe to grind and the voters get to watch it unfold.

The Hek

- Be sure to check out Episode 18 of the Audio Circus podcast -

Monday, November 13, 2006

Arland Bruce, What The $#@& Were You Thinking?!

Arland Bruce is a talented football player. This year, he led the Toronto Argonauts in receiving yards and touchdowns. Without him, the Argos probably would have lost to Winnipeg last week. He's a popular player and does his part in the community.

But yesterday, Arland Bruce did not use his head.

I'm not putting the blame on him for Toronto's loss to Montreal. It's just that his actions during and after yesterday's game, has left many fans shaking their heads.

In the third quarter, Damon Allen threw an interception that was returned for a touchdown. This one play turned out to be the most crucial moment in Montreal's victory. Bruce was on the field during this play. Instead of chasing the Montreal player - and there's no doubt that he would have caught up to the Alouette player, preventing the touchdown - Bruce ran towards Allen, screaming that he was open and should have had the pass thrown to him, instead of Andre Talbot, the intended receiver. When Bruce got back to the sidelines, Toronto linebacker Mike O'Shea berated him for being an idiot on the field. The two had to be separated by fellow teammates and coaches.

Then after the game, Bruce stated that the reason why the Argos lost, was because the referees are "racists" and take bribes. He went on to say that since Head Coach Michael Clemons is black, the refs made calls in favor of Montreal.

Needless to say, the Argonauts were not too thrilled about Bruce's comments. They have since fined him and distanced the team from his comments.

First off Arland, since when do you go yell at your quarterback while the opponents are in the process of scoring against your team. Did I mention this was a playoff game? The way I see it, when something goes wrong, you fix the problem and then discuss what went wrong. It's not the other way around. You're very lucky O'Shea didn't knock you out.

Second, the Argos didn't loose because your coach is black and the refs are racists. The Alouettes were simply the better team. Instead of accepting defeat, you make some cowardly excuse. Believe me, I'm pretty sure the CFL screens their refs. Be a man and apologize for your comments.

The faster you do this, the faster the fans will forgive you.

The Hek

- Catch Episode Eighteen of The Audio Circus -

Friday, November 10, 2006

Always Remember...

Everything we have is because of those who sacrificed their lives in the name of freedom and peace.

WWI. WWII. Korea. Afghanistan.

Remember to wear your poppy to honour everyday people who became extraordinary heroes. Past, present and future. Do it for those who work very hard to make the world a better place.

The Hek

Thursday, November 09, 2006

Chance Of A Lifetime - Part Two


I totally missed the boat.

I guess Robert Gates would be a better candidate then me.

He's ran the CIA. I ran..........a summer camp.

Meanwhile I'm off to go chill with Slapshot The Bear at the Waxers game tonight.

The Hek

Wednesday, November 08, 2006

Chance Of A Lifetime


I am seriously considering applying for the position of United States Defense Secretary.

I have thought about it a lot and I really think that I match the qualifications.

As far as I know, there is no reason why I would not be hired for this job.

Nothing at all.

The Hek

Tuesday, November 07, 2006

Damon Allen: The Man To Start

First off, I refuse to write anything about the end of Mr. and Mrs. Federline. Totally not worth my time and energy. Instead, I'm going to write about something more important: the CFL playoffs.

The Argonauts will face the Montreal Alouettes for the Eastern Division title. Pinball has announced that Damon Allen will be the starting Quarterback. I feel that this is the right call to make.

For those that don't know, Allen started Sunday's playoff match against the Winnipeg Blue Bombers. Down 27-17, late in the 4th quarter, Allen (who was not performing well) was replaced for back-up QB, Michael Bishop. Bishop came in and threw two clutch TD passes, leading the Argos to a 31-27 victory. Immediately the question arose as to who will start this Sunday's match against Montreal, Allen or Bishop.

Damon Allen is the man you want to have out there. He's experienced and will not crack under pressure in front of close to 50,000 Alouette fans at the Olympic Stadium. I'm not saying that Bishop would crack. It's just that Allen has been through this situation many times before.

If I had to make the decision, I would have chosen Allen because I believe in second chances. Just because you mess up something, doesn't mean you should never do that "something" again. The best way to learn from your mistakes is if you try again and avoid the errors you made. That goes for anyone, whether you're a teacher, accountant or, in the case of Damon Allen, a 20-year CFL veteran. Having said that, you do have to set a limit in case Allen plays the same way he did against Winnipeg.

What I would do is start Allen and evaluate his performance at the end of every quarter. If he's playing well, you leave him in. If he's not playing well, you put Bishop in.

We'll see what transpires this Sunday.

The Hek

-Catch Episode Seventeen of The Audio Circus-

Monday, November 06, 2006

Job Hunt 2006.......Continues

Things are starting to get better.

Since the end of September, I have gone from applying to a job and not getting a response, to applying to jobs and getting responses. The response I get is, "Thank you for your interest but, you are not what we are exactly looking for. We will keep your resume on file." It might not be the desired result, but hey, it's a good improvement.

Here's the best part: Last Tuesday, I went downtown for a job interview.

It was an awesome experience. I printed off an extra copy of my resume, put on my finest suit and looked over all the notes I made the previous night. The interview went quite well and I made a good impression.

Unfortunately, the company that interviewed me, chose a different applicant which, is fine. It was good practice for interviews, down the road.

Something good is going to happen. I can feel it.

The Hek

-It's here! Episode Seventeen of the Audio Circus Podcast-

Friday, November 03, 2006

Battle Of The Titans: House Of Pain!

The following contest is scheduled for one fall.

Introducing first. From the Academy, weighing in at over 300 pounds, Officer Thomas 'House' Conklin! (This was the best I could find. There's no photo of the guy on the internet.)

And his opponent. From Baltimore, weighing in at 150 pounds, Dr. Gregory House!

This would be one hell of a battle. My money would be on the good Doctor. Although good is not a word to describe the man's people skills. Here's his strategy: He comes up with a number of ways to beat Officer House, that don't work but then, figures out the proper way to beat him. All done within 60 minutes.

The Hek

Thursday, November 02, 2006

Just Ask President Bush.

John Kerry is in hot water for comments he made to a group of students. What he was suppose to say was, "if people don't do well in school they end up getting us stuck in a war in Iraq. Just ask President Bush." Instead, he said "people who don't study hard and do their homework would likely get stuck in Iraq."

This botched joke, as people are calling it, has forced the Democrats to do some damage control and, it has given the Republicans some political fodder.

Personally, I'm not surprised something like this has happened. This is because John Kerry is a dull, boring man.

You want to know why Bush won in 2004? It wasn't because of red states to blue states, conservative values to liberal values, or whether Iraq was good idea. The Democrats lost because their candidate lacked passion and emotion.

Voters around the world do not want a leader who is so uptight because he/she is afraid that anything he or she says or does, might offend someone. God forbid a politician should do something wild and crazy. Unfortunately, most politicians are like this and that's why people always plug their noses and vote for the lesser of two or more evils.

To me, the best politicians are the ones who've got the style, the swagger, and most importantly, care about their country. Politics is a lot like professional wrestling. There are many who want to be the best but, it's the ones who are charismatic that actually achieve their goal. The political leaders we will remember are the ones who are passionate about what they do and have the swagger that hooks people in.

So many come to mind.

Bill Clinton; he played the sax, chatted up the ladies and carried the United States into a new millennium. He never lost.

Ronald Reagan; he wanted to beat the Soviets and was willing to do anything. All he had to do was use his acting skills and he could convince Americans on anything.

Pierre Trudeau; believed in a just society and couldn't care if his personal life was the deciding factor for most Canadian voters. He brought in our Charter and had the guts to dance behind the Queen's back.

Rene Levesque; the only reason why Quebec Independence is a "hot button" issue is because Levesque believed in it with such vigor. Say what you will, he did a great job of being the thorn of Canadian politics. He brought attention to the issues he and his followers cared about.

Ed Broadbent; here is a man that cares about his country. In his speeches, in his appearances and in his beliefs, Broadbent is a man who lives for every single Canadian. I'd argue that he is the best politician that never got to be Prime Minister.

John Kerry didn't botch the joke because he read the wrong thing. He botched it because he had no style. Style, conviction, compassion, charisma, emotion; in politics, it goes a long way.

The Hek

Wednesday, November 01, 2006

Let's Go Raptors!

For the first time in a few years, I am pumped up about the upcoming Raptors' season.

Today isn't just the start of the team's 11th season. I would argue that this is also the official start to "Chapter Three" of the Toronto Raptors' history. Chapter One started when Toronto was awarded the franchise and goes until 1998. Chapter Two goes from when the Maple Leafs buy the Raptors and ends earlier this year when Bryan Collangello, is hired as the team's new General Manager.

So what will Chapter Three have in store? Well, anything can happen. However, you can't help but feel optimistic about the Raptors.

Toronto finally has a braintrust that actually knows what they're doing. Collangello has brought in some top talent from overseas such as Anthony Parker, Jose Calderon and Andrea Bargnani. There's also TJ Ford and Kris Humphries who came over in offseason trades. And of course, there are returning players like Chris Bosh and Morris Peterson.

The Raptors won't blow everyone out of the water; however, I feel there is going to be a major improvement from last year's 27-55 record. When it comes to the playoffs, I think there's a good chance they can make it. My prediction is that they will finish somewhere between 7th and 10th place in the NBA Eastern Conference.

One thing is for sure, this team is going to develop into a pretty good ball club.

The Hek

Tuesday, October 31, 2006

Sweat Pants

It's too bad we live in a society where clothing plays a major role in describing who we are. If it were up to me, I'd wear sweat pants all the time.

Sweat pants are fantastic. When I was kid, I would wear them 24/7. It wasn't until high school that I started to dress in jeans and khakis. It's a shame because they were so comfortable. You could go anywhere, and they wouldn't give you any trouble.

Now, I have heard some say that sweat pants is a "sign that you have given up trying to attract women." Well I say that is just jibba-jabber. There is nothing wrong with wearing sweat pants. Hell, if I'm dumb enough to get married, I think I'm going to wear a pair of sweats to my wedding.

So tonight, as you go around collecting/eating lots and lots candy, take a moment and think about the wonders of sweat pants.

Sweat pants: nature's way of making life so damn comfortable.

The Hek

-After the tricks and treats, catch Episode 16 of the Audio Circus-

Monday, October 30, 2006

He Really Wants To Drive a Bus

A 15-year-old boy in Florida, steals a bus.

He drives the normal routes, picks up passengers and collects fare.

He was arrested and charged.

How does a 15-year-old boy manage to steal a bus and then actually pretend to be a bus driver? Better yet, how is it that passengers get on the bus and not notice that their driver is a 15-year-old boy? Granted, one passenger did find it suspicious and called police.

Now, maybe the boy looked older then he was. Then again, maybe he is the same boy that drove Indiana Jones around in Temple of Doom.

Okay, that's a bit of a stretch but still, you can't help but speculate.

One thing is for sure: this boy wants to be a bus driver when he grows up. I've seen children pretend to be doctors, hockey players and cooks. They grow up and actually become, doctors, hockey players and cooks. Of course, now the boy has to wait a few years before he's allowed to go near a bus.

The Hek

-Check out Episode Sixteen of The Audio Circus for The Hek's final thoughts on the World Series-

Thursday, October 26, 2006

I Think He's Got A Frog In His Throat

For your listening pleasure, a small clip that shows the excitement of live radio.

Trust me, battling a cold and trying to do a newscast, can yield some interesting results.

Click here for the clip (runtime: 50 seconds).

PS: I have fully gotten over the cold. Now if only I could get rid of this cough.

The Hek

Wednesday, October 25, 2006

Comin' From Bounty Land

Time to add more tunes to The Hek's Super Playlist.

You know the drill. New entries are in red.

1. Kennedy Killed the Hat - Buck 65
2. I bought some books - Black Boot Trio
3. Watching the Wheels - John Lennon
4. Vacation - The Go-Go's
5. Like a Prayer - Madonna
6. Night Swimming - REM
7. Chicago - Sufjan Stevens
8. Ring, Ring - Abba
9. Call on Me - Eric Prydz
10. November Rain - Guns N Roses
11. Cruel Summer - Bannanarama
12. Hung up - Madonna
13. 463 - Buck 65
14. Judy is a Punk - The Ramones
15. The Laws have Changed - The New Pornographers
16. Portland, Oregon - Loretta Lynn feat. Jack White
17. Suzanne - Leonard Cohen
18. The Card Cheat - The Clash
19. Canadian Railroad Trilogy - Gordon Lightfoot
20. Boys in the Bright White Sports Car - Trooper
21. Mandy - Barry Manilow
22. Let's Get Together - Al Green
23. Mickey - Toni Basil
24. Bodies - Drowning Pool
25. Folson Prison Blues - Johnny Cash
26. Bawitaba - Kid Rock
27. Losing Grip - Avril Lavigne
28. City of New Orleans - Arlo Guthrie
29. Pump it - Black Eye Peas
30. Lonley Old Eyes - Neko Case
31. Immigrant Song - Led Zepplin
32. Philadelphia Freedom - Elton John
33. Don't Walk Away Eileen - Sam Roberts
34. Bring the Noise - Public Enemy & Anthrax
35. Maneater - Nelly Furtado
36. Gypsies, Tramps & Thieves - Cher
37. My Immortal - Evanescense
38. Hips Don't Lie - Shakira
39. Welcome to the Jungle - Guns and Roses
40. Bad Habit - The Offspring
41. LDN - Lily Allen
42. Man I use to Be - K-OS
43. Lollipop - Aqua
44. Banquet - Bloc Party

Most of these songs are on YouTube, if you ever wanted to check them out.

The Hek

Tuesday, October 24, 2006

Tuesday Night Fever


Remember on the weekend how I said my voice was a bit off. Well, guess what. It developed into a cold with a slight fever. Fortunately, it's not as bad as the fever I had way back in May. Also, I only get the fever at night so, it doesn't affect me during the day.

Like most people, I get the flu at the worst times. In fact, here are my top five unfortunate moments, when the flu made my life miserable.

5. October, 1994. It's Halloween and while everyone is trick or treating, The Hek is grounded with the chicken pox. I didn't know what was worse; the fever the led to the pox or, how itchy those little $#&@ers were.

4. March, 2005. It was one of those moments when your head is boiling and your body is freezing. The only time I left my apartment was for an improv practice. Now, you're probably wondering why I would take part in a practice with a 103 degree fever. Simple. I would have gone insane if I didn't get out. The only positive was that I had my radio as a companion and some brilliant DJ on CKCU was playing a record of "Hitchhiker's guide to the Galaxy."

3. December, 1999 and December, 2001. The good old holiday break. Two weeks where you don't have to worry about school. It's a time when one goes and has fun with his friends in the snow. Not for The Hek who was sidelined for a good portion of the break. Serves me right for working with the "customers" at my paying job for a couple of days.

2. September, 2002. It's Frosh Week and suddenly during the Bif Naked concert, I start to get that "feeling." The next day was 28'C and yet, I was forced to wear a jacket, touque and gloves. That's how bad it was. Talk about making a first impression. Good thing most people on the floor didn't judge a book by it's cover.

And NUMBER 1. July, 1990. Three days after my father purchases a brand new car, a 7-year-old The Hek is in the passenger seat and gets that horrible feeling in his stomach. I don't need to go into detail because, I'm sure you pretty much get the picture.

The Hek

- Whether you're sick or in good health, check out Episode 15 of The Audio Circus Podcast -

Monday, October 23, 2006

Time Stands Still

I need to learn how to relax more.

For some reason, I keep setting these schedules for myself. These schedules are totally not necessary but for some reason, if I don't follow them, I get stressed out. Here's an example of what I'm talking about:

On Sundays, I have to be up by 9am. Then, I have to leave for the gym at 9:30. I have to finish my work out by 11:30. I have to return home, eat something, shower, shave and start working on my podcast by 1pm. Then, I need to finish putting together my podcast by suppertime.

This past Sunday, I got all flustered because I woke up 9:30am, got to the gym at 10:20, started working on the podcast at 2:30 and released it at 5:30pm.

I needed to give myself a good punch in the face.

I have to keep reminding myself that it's Sunday and that I'm not on any deadlines. I can release a new episode of my podcast at any time as long as it's done before the clock strikes midnight. However, I keep trying to follow this dumb schedule which in turn, turns Sunday into a nuisance instead of a nice, relaxing day.

I've always been guilty of this. I don't know why this is; it's just that I like a little control in my life. Nothing wrong with living the day by just taking it as it is. It's just that I would prefer to have a frame so I know what can happen, what is unlikely to happen and, have a spot for unexpected moments.

Well, something to work on, I guess.

The Hek

- Be sure to catch Episode Fifthteen of The Audio Circus -

Friday, October 20, 2006

MLB Predictions - Part Three

Let's review,

Detroit vs. Oakland
Hek's Prediction: Detroit wins, four games to three.
What really happened: Detroit sweeps the series.

New York vs. St. Louis
Hek's Prediction: New York wins, four games to two.
What really happened: St. Louis wins, four games to three.

At least I was right about Detroit......sort of.

To be honest, I can't explain the Tigers. Beating the Twins and Athletics, was a piece of cake. Not bad for a team that looked like it ran out of gas when the playoffs started. As for St. Louis, the Cardinals have proven that everything that happens in the regular season, goes out the window for the post-season. What's really aggravating about St. Louis, is that they only won 83 games and yet still managed to take the NL Central title. To put it in context, the Blue Jays won 88 games and that, wasn't enough to win the AL East or the Wild Card. On to the Fall Classic:

The World Series

Detroit Tigers vs. St. Louis Cardinals

The Cards have the hitting and their pitchers are good, but not great. The Tigers, on the other hand, also have the hitting and a phenomenal group of pitchers. The matter which will be most interesting is to see if Detroit can play the same way they did during the first two rounds. Remember, the Tigers won the ALCS last week and have not played since October 14th. Meanwhile, the Cards won the NLCS yesterday and only have today off before starting the World Series. So it will be interesting to see if Detroit has any rust after being off for a week. Personally, I think the Tigers will not be affected by the rest. They have played some great baseball and the week off only allows them to prepare. Plus it gives them time to rest any injuries that may have occurred.

Hek's Prediction: Tigers win, four games to two.

The Hek

Thursday, October 19, 2006

You've Been Punk'd! Clinton style.

Ashton Kucher will not be sending Bill Clinton a holiday greeting, this year.

It seems as though Kucher and his wife, Demi Moore, were at a function and sat with the former President. Clinton spent the entire evening chatting it up with Demi, while completely ignoring Ashton. Needless to say, Kelso was very pissed off.

Correct me if I'm wrong. But hasn't something like this happened before to Demi? I seem to recall a time when she was married to Woody Harrelson and during a game of pool, Robert Redford came over and started talking to her. Redford was so enthralled with her, he proposed something to Woody that was rather indecent.

Now Ashton, I can totally understand if you're upset about this. But dude, let me tell you something: Let is slide.

This isn't some regular Joe who you can punch in the face and tell him to leave your woman alone. Hell, it's not even Colin Farrel. It's a former President of the most power nation in the world. You can't just go up to him and say, "If I see you make a move on my wife, one more time, I'm going to break you in half."

Listen, if a former President makes a move on your women, you let him do it.


Because he was once THE PRESIDENT and if you lay even the smallest part of your pinky finger on him, you get gang tackled by 50 Secret Service Agents.

I know you want to be Demi Moore's Guardian; but remember, every person who becomes the President of the United Sates of America, is allowed to order three assassinations. Not every President uses them. But, they're there, just in case.

The Hek

Wednesday, October 18, 2006

Take My Wives......Please!

The Mets might lose tonight and I might have egg on my face, tomorrow. As I said before, the only way the Cardinals will win the NLCS is if they take advantage of New York's weak pitching staff. Of course, I figured this wouldn't happen and picked the Mets. We'll see what happens.

Now for your viewing pleasure, Henry Rollins on Polygamy.

The Hek

Tuesday, October 17, 2006

Your Thought of The Day

Yeah, nothing more enjoyable then seeing K-Fed getting FU'd on Monday Night RAW. I also bet that the Wild Boyz aren't feeling too good either after their "match." But now, on to your thought of the day:

If there are undercover police officers who disguise themselves as civilians, could there also be undercover civilians who disguise themselves as police officers? Think about it.

The Hek

While you're pondering that, you can check out Episode Fourteen of the Audio Circus podcast.

Monday, October 16, 2006

I Pity The Fool Who Thinks This is a Bad Idea

It was brought to my attention that plans are in the works for a feature film about The A-Team. This is the best news I have heard out of Hollywood in a long time. There have been rumors as to who will play the main characters and if it's the names that I have heard, you can bet that I will be seeing this movie on the day it's released.

This reminds of when Dukes of Hazzard was released as a film. I couldn't care how cheesy it would be, I had to see it and it was worth every penny.

In the meantime, here is The Hek's choice of who should be in the A-Team movie. Some of the names have already been mentioned in the rumor mill.

B.A. - Ving Rhimes
Hannibal - Mel Gibson
Face - Charlie Sheen
Murdock - Jim Carrey

I can't wait.

The Hek

- Catch Episode Fourteen of The Audio Circus -

Friday, October 13, 2006


If you're in Ottawa this weekend, be sure to check out this:

Oct 9th, 2006

Get ready for some hilarious fun!

The Carleton Improv Association (CIA) is performing another exciting and hysterical show as it performs its debut show for the 2006-2007 season.

Come see the CIA
Saturday, Oct 14th, 2006
Doors open at 7:00pm, show starts at 7:30pm
Mike's Place - 2nd Floor University Centre
at Carleton University


Come watch the CIA perform games in the style of
Whose Line is it Anyway?

It is an interactive show so come ready to shout out suggestions!

For more information contact us at

We hope to see you at the show!

CIA - Carleton Improv Association

Carleton University's Official Comedy Troupe Since 1999


Now if you excuse me, I have to put on a giant bear costume and run around the arena during tonight's Markham Waxers game. Yes, you're reading correctly.

The Hek

Thursday, October 12, 2006

This Entry Is Brought To You By....

I need money.

Ideally, the money would come from a job in broadcasting. It would be enough for me to move out of my parents house and resume the independence and growth I had in Ottawa. Unfortunately, this plan is not working out as I hoped. I'm bringing in some but, it's not enough. However, I have come up with a way to make money as I continue the old job search:

Sponsorship and advertising!

Yes, you're reading correctly. I'm giving all major corporations out there the chance to sponsor my thoughts, feelings, movements and actions throughout the day. For a respectable fee, you can have your company's name mentioned in all my written entries. Best part of all is that no one will notice a difference in how I write. Just take a look at this sample entry:

The Hek's Timex Wake Up Call was at 6:15am, today. He rolled out of bed, thinking about how comfortable his sleep was, thanks in large part to the new Simmons Rest-Easy mattress. After assembling his wardrobe, provided by Roots, The Hek made his way to the kitchen. He enjoyed some toast and a healthy bowl of Cheerios which now, contains zero grams of sugar. Next stop, the bathroom where, The Hek brushed his teeth and remarked how great they look ever since he started using the Crest Whitestrips.

Throwing on his Addidas, The Hek went outside and headed to the bus stop. Fortunately, he didn't have to wait long as York Region Transit always provides convenient busses. Hey, they not only move The Hek but the entire York Region as well.

The Hek arrived at work with enough time to say hello to Johnny, the friendly service attendant at Esso. The work day was full exciting moments which The Hek captured on the new Nikon Digital camera. He also enjoyed a hearty lunch which included a delicious bowl of Tim Horton's chili.

Finally, the day came to an end and The Hek headed home excited, as he was going to watch the baseball game on his Panasonic High Definition television.

The Microsoft Current Mood: Happy

The Taco Bell Current Music: The new single from Canadian Idol winner, Eva Avila. Now available at HMV.

See what I mean. The change is so minimal, no one has any proof to call me a sell-out.

The Hek

Wednesday, October 11, 2006

MLB Predictions - Part Two

First off, I want to extend my deepest sympathies to the family of former Toronto Blue Jays' pitcher, Cory Lidle. Lidle, who was currently with the Yankees, was the pilot of a small aircraft that crashed into a New York condominium this afternoon. My thoughts also go out to the families of the other victims involved in the crash.

Here's a recap of my predictions for the four division series:

New York (AL) vs. Detroit
Hek's Prediction: Yankees win, three games to one.
What really happened: Tigers win, three games to one.

Minnesota vs. Oakland
Hek's Prediction: Twins win, three games to two.
What really happened: Athletics sweep the series.

St. Louis vs. San Diego
Hek's Prediction: Padres win, three games to two.
What really happened: Cardinals win, three games to one.

New York (NL) vs. Los Angeles
Hek's Prediction: Mets win, three games to one.
What really happened: Mets sweep the series.

Okay, not the best of results. But 25% ain't bad, right?

If anything, this year's post-season is a good reminder of how the regular season means nothing. Once the playoffs start, everything that went on during the past six months, goes out the window and everyone, starts with a clean slate. I never expected the Tigers to regroup. Nor did I expect the Athletics to manhandle the Twins. As for Cardinals, it didn't really matter who won because neither them nor the Padres would go past the second round. Having said that, here are my predictions for League Championship Series.

American League Championship Series

Detroit Tigers vs. Oakland Athletics

The Tigers have already drawn first blood but, don't count out the Athletics. Both teams are equally talented. Having seen them play like they did during most of the regular season, I am fully confident in Detroit's abilities. They have some good hitters in Ivan Rodriguez, Sean Casey (if he stays healthy) and Placido Planco. But their strength is with their pitching. The Tigers are led by veteran Kenny Rogers and two rookies who have put together solid seasons in Justin Verlander and Jeremy Bonderman. Plus, you can't forget Joel Zumaya and his 100 MPH fastball. However, if Detroit is going to win, they need to neutralize Oakland's power hitters. If you get intimidated by Frank Thomas, Milton Bradley or Eric Chavez, then the Athletics are going to walk all over their opponents, just like they did with Minnesota. No doubt, it's going to be a dogfight.

Hek's Prediction: Tigers win, four games to three.

National League Championship Series

New York Mets vs. St. Louis Cardinals

The Dodgers were easy to beat. The Cardinals however, will be a true test for the Mets. If New York wants to win, they need to get lots of runs because their pitching is suspect. With Pedro Martinez and Orlando Hernandez on the disabled list, Tom Glavine is their only star pitcher. Everyone else is sketchy. The Mets have the hitters and as long as they can take advantage of mistakes made by the Cards' picthers, they'll be able to win the series. It won't be a cakewalk but, you can expect New York to control the series.

Hek's Prediction: Mets win, four games to two.

As always, I love to hear your predictions.

The Hek

Tuesday, October 10, 2006

Google and YouTube, sitting in a tree...

I didn't get to my computer until 10:00pm. Originally, I was going to give my predictions for the ALCS and NLCS. However, I'm going to hold that off until Wednesday when I'm more alert.

In the meantime, here is probably the biggest story in "new media" for the year.

The Hek

-Check out Episode Thirteen of The Audio Circus-

Monday, October 09, 2006

I'm Thankful for Wikipedia

You've probably wondered about it.

Why do Canadians celebrate Thanksgiving day in October, and Americans, celebrate it in November?

Both countries have the exact same things. Turkey, stuffing, giving thanks, two football games, etc.

Now, most people know the origins of American Thanksgiving, but how did it start in Canada?

Well, the good people at Wikipedia have the answer:

Thanksgiving in Canada

In Canada, Thanksgiving is celebrated on the second Monday in October. The United States later set aside the same day as the federal holiday of Columbus Day. Canadians give thanks for a successful harvest. The roots of the Canadian holiday are different than those of the United States of America.

The history of Thanksgiving in Canada goes back to an English explorer, Martin Frobisher, who had been trying to find a northern passage to the Orient. He did not succeed but he did establish a settlement in Canada. In the year 1578, he held a formal ceremony, in what is now the province of Newfoundland and Labrador, to give thanks for surviving the long journey. This is considered the first Canadian Thanksgiving, and the first Thanksgiving to have taken place in North America. Other settlers arrived and continued these ceremonies. Frobisher was later knighted and had an inlet of the Atlantic Ocean in northern Canada named after him - Frobisher Bay.

At the same time, French settlers, having crossed the ocean and arrived in Canada with explorer Samuel de Champlain, also held huge feasts of thanks. They even formed 'The Order of Good Cheer' and gladly shared their food with their Native-Canadian neighbours.

After the Seven Years' War ended in 1763 handing over New France to the British, the citizens of Halifax held a special day of Thanksgiving.

During the American Revolution, American refugees who remained loyal (United Empire Loyalists) to Great Britain were exiled from the United States and came to Canada. They brought the customs and practices of the American Thanksgiving to Canada.

Eventually in 1879, the Canadian Parliament declared November 6th a day of Thanksgiving and a national holiday in Canada. Over the years many dates were used for Thanksgiving, the most popular being the third Monday in October. After World War I, both Armistice Day and Thanksgiving were celebrated on the Monday of the week in which November 11th occurred. Ten years later, in 1931, the two days became separate holidays, and Armistice Day was renamed Remembrance Day.

Finally, on January 31st, 1957, the Canadian Parliament proclaimed...

"A Day of General Thanksgiving to Almighty God for the bountiful harvest with which Canada has been blessed ... to be observed on the 2nd Monday in October."

Now you know.

The Hek

-After Thanksgiving dinner, relax with Episode Thirteen of The Audio Circus-

Friday, October 06, 2006

Some Links You've Got To Check Out

For your long weekend/Thanksgiving enjoyment, here is some cool YouTube material.

First off, my friend Steve is in York University's Film program and has been posting his projects. If you like martial arts and insight on dreams, you definitely want to check out his page.

Second, my buddy Will from the Carleton Improv Association has been making some short films. The material brings me back to the good old days when my friends and I would make films just for the sake of having fun. The stuff Will has put together is intriguing and hilarious at the same time.

Steve's Page

Will's Page

Finally, here's a fun clip from CHEV. I like to call it Soberin' Up.

Happy Turkey Day

The Hek

Thursday, October 05, 2006

Just A Reminder

You can catch The Hek trying to be a News Anchor, Monday to Friday, every 30 minutes from 9-12am on CHEV Radio. The show is also replayed from 8-11pm.


More importantly:

This week, we lost two more soldiers in Afghanistan. For me, this isn't about politics. It's about the brave men and women who risk their lives so that the world could be a better place. If possible, wear RED tomorrow to show your support. No one said it would be easy. But every little effort counts.

The Hek

Wednesday, October 04, 2006

Two Music Videos You Have to See

Kung-Fu, techno, rose coloured glasses, smart messages and, a girl with a thick middle class, English accent.

Combine all this and you've got two fantastic videos The Hek stumbled upon as he was taking part in the art of procrastination.

On to the videos.

First video: A mixture of techno, kung-fu, and one of Canada's top hip hop artists.

Second video: A catchy little tune, with a cute girl who gives us an interesting tour of London.


The Hek

Tuesday, October 03, 2006

MLB Predictions - Part One

The World Series playoffs are here. If you love drama, there is nothing better then baseball's postseason. Having said that, here are The Hek's predictions :

American League Division Series

New York Yankees (AL East Champs) vs. Detroit Tigers (AL Wild Card)

If you were to ask me a month ago who I thought was going to represent the American League in the World Series, I would have said the Tigers. Let's face it, Detroit has had a phenomenal year. However, they're not going to get past the Yankees. The Tigers have simply run out of gas (hence only getting the Wild Card) while the Yankees, with their sheer experience, get stronger as the season goes on.

Hek's Pick: Yankees win, 3 games to 1.

Minnesota Twins (AL Central Champs) vs. Oakland Athletics (AL West Champs)

Although the A's have taken game one in the series, the Twins are my pick. Minnesota has been on such a roll and baring a disastrous collapse, I can't see anyone knocking them off. Maybe it's the great play of Johan Santana and Canadian Justin Morneau; or, maybe the spirit of Kirby Puckett is guiding the team. Beating Oakland won't be easy though. The Athletics have Frank Thomas. He's big and he's mean. It's going to be a close one.

Hek's Pick: Twins win, 3 games to 2.

National League Division Series

St. Louis Cardinals (NL Central Champs) vs. San Diego Padres (NL West Champs)

The Cards won the first game this afternoon. Nevertheless, this series can go either way. It doesn't matter who wins. Neither team will be in the finals. St. Louis is falling apart and San Diego comes from the weakest division in the league.

Hek's pick: Padres win, 3 games to 2.

New York Mets (NL East Champs) vs. Los Angeles Dodgers (NL Wild Card)

The Mets have had a great season and have been my pick to represent the NL for quite some time. They won't walk all over the Dodgers but, will control most of the series. LA comes from the same weak division as the Padres. Also, New York has Carlos Delgado and Shawn Green. Two former Blue Jays who were great players and deserve their taste of playoff baseball.

Hek's pick: Mets win, 3 games to 1.

For the remainder of the playoffs:

League Championship Series
Minnesota over New York (AL)
New York (NL) over San Diego

World Series
Minnesota over New York (NL)

Love to hear your predictions!

The Hek

Be sure to catch Episode Twelve of the Audio Circus Podcast

Monday, October 02, 2006

Find Your Target

Here's a commercial for the X-Box 360:

Turns out, this advertisement was banned. Personally, I don't feel there's anything wrong with it. However, I can understand why it was not allowed to be aired; especially given recent events. So, is it harmless or, poor taste?

The Hek

-Catch Episode Twelve of The Audio Circus-

Thursday, September 28, 2006

The Hek's Super Playlist.

We're up to 40, baby! As always, new entries are in red.

1. Kennedy Killed the Hat - Buck 65
2. I bought some books - Black Boot Trio
3. Watching the Wheels - John Lennon
4. Vacation - The Go-Go's
5. Like a Prayer - Madonna
6. Night Swimming - REM
7. Chicago - Sufjan Stevens
8. Ring, Ring - Abba
9. Call on Me - Eric Prydz
10. November Rain - Guns N Roses
11. Cruel Summer - Bannanarama
12. Hung up - Madonna
13. 463 - Buck 65
14. Judy is a Punk - The Ramones
15. The Laws have Changed - The New Pornographers
16. Portland, Oregon - Loretta Lynn feat. Jack White
17. Suzanne - Leonard Cohen
18. The Card Cheat - The Clash
19. Canadian Railroad Trilogy - Gordon Lightfoot
20. Boys in the Bright White Sports Car - Trooper
21. Mandy - Barry Manilow
22. Let's Get Together - Al Green
23. Mickey - Toni Basil
24. Bodies - Drowning Pool
25. Folson Prison Blues - Johnny Cash
26. Bawitaba - Kid Rock
27. Losing Grip - Avril Lavigne
28. City of New Orleans - Arlo Guthrie
29. Pump it - Black Eye Peas
30. Lonely Old Eyes - Neko Case
31. Immigrant Song - Led Zepplin
32. Philadelphia Freedom - Elton John
33. Don't Walk Away Eileen - Sam Roberts
34. Bring the Noise - Public Enemy & Anthrax
35. Maneater - Nelly Furtado
36. Gypsies, Tramps & thieves - Cher

37. My Immortal - Evanescense

38. Hips Don't Lie - Shakira

39. Welcome to the Jungle - Guns and Roses

40. Bad Habit - The Offspring

The Hek

Wednesday, September 27, 2006

Tell me if this makes sense

When composing an e-mail, the receiver's address can be placed in one of the following categories: To, CC or BCC.

Here is what I believe the function of CC should be:

If you receive an e-mail and you find that your address is in the CC category, it means that you are not directly involved with the subject of the e-mail. However, you do have some stock in the aforementioned subject.

A gentleman at the community station I'm helping out at, was insulted because he received an e-mail and his address, was in the To category and not CC. He told the sender that his address should be in the CC category as a form of respect. In other words, the gentleman feels that because he has done his share at the station, he feels that he should be CC'd for all e-mails as a way of respecting and appreciating his contribution.

So with this in mind, what is the real function of CC?

Is it what I feel it should be or, does it match the gentleman's description?

The Hek

Tuesday, September 26, 2006

Tie and Belinda

I have a question about this story:


Do we really need to know how a hockey player possibly cheated on his wife by sleeping with the "honourable member" from Newmarket-Aurora? Many couples go thorough this unfortunate circumstance. The only reason why this one has taken so much spotlight is involves a hockey player and the "honourable member" from Newmarket-Aurora.

I know.......those who choose to be in the public eye can kiss their privacy goodbye. It's nature to know the ins and outs of those we look up to. I'd be the first to admit, I'm very guilty of this. But sometimes, you have to ask yourselves, how much is too much?

Irving Layton is one of my favourite poets. I like him for his poetry. The fact that he was unfaithful as a husband and a father is an unfortunate fact. However, I care more about the poetry then his escapades.

Same can be said with Tie Domi. He brought grit and passion as a hockey player. He may not have been the best husband but, his private life has nothing to do with why people like him.
I am hoping that the sports media ignore this story. There's a lot more important things going on.

Besides, if we really wanted to know what goes on in the private life of an athlete, politician, actor or musician, we should look at our own lives. It's pretty much the same. Of course, with the exception of fame.

The Hek

-Catch Episode Eleven of the Audio Circus-

Monday, September 25, 2006

It's Real. It's Damn Real!

Kurt, I hope you know what you're doing.

On the bright side:

- Angle vs. A.J Styles
- Angle vs. Christopher Daniels
- Angle vs. Samoa Joe

The Hek

Following the Three I's: The Audio Circus. Check out Episode Eleven.

Friday, September 22, 2006

The Working Life

This past week was the first time I could really get the taste of what it's like to have the 9-5 type of job. It has its pros and it certainly has its cons. However, I actually found it kind of fun. Now this is just after one week so, we'll have to see how I feel after I get a few years under my belt.

Waking up 6:15am is not exactly my cup of tea. But I found that getting about 6.5 - 7 hours of sleep every night, before getting up at 6:15, made things much easier.

What I really enjoyed was just the so-called "hustle and bustle." Rushing off to make a couple of busses, standing shoulder to shoulder with people, getting to know the bus drivers; this was something I never really got to experience as a student. Public School and High School were five minute walks from my house and of course, I lived on campus in Ottawa. Taking part in "Rush Hour" makes me feel human, it makes me feel alive. It brings a smile to my face because as you know, these were feelings I didn't have last year at this time.

Best of all, I get out of my house.

The Hek